How do I stop smoking?

I am not addicted to smoking but I smoke 1 cigarette a day. It was 1 cigarettes a month when I started. Then it became 2 in a month, 3 in a month, 2 in a week, 5 in a week and finally everyday. Last week I smoked 7 cigarettes. If I get so angry or very stressed, I smoke 2 cigarettes a day but its not a thing that happens so often. My boyfriend is a smoker too. He smokes about 40 cigarettes a week. And his cigarette has nicotine and the other harmful things more than mine. I started smoking in august, as I remember he started about 7-8 months ago. When we smoke together, its good. But actually I dont want to smoke anymore because I dont want to need it. I used to live without it and now I can live without it again. But its really hard when he doesnt want to stop smoking. When he smokes next to me, I want to smoke too. If I stop smoking, I would start again. Or even I stop myself about not to start again, when he kisses me, his lips taste like cigarette. It felt disgusting at the beginning but now I dont feel a negative thing about how his lips taste like because mine are the same now. If I stop smoking, I can feel disgusted again. I feel really confused. If I stop smoking, I am going to do it in new year party on 31st december. I am going to smoke my last cigarettes. Or I will never stop I guess… Comments please? I really need your help. There’s nobody that I can trust and talk with about this subject.

Answer #1

You ARE addicted to smoking. Otherwise you wouldn’t be smoking and wouldn’t have the urge to smoke when someone else does. Simple a that. Both of you are damaging your lungs and bodies. Him smoking 40 cigarettes a day does not make him a worse person then you. Why not stop now if you aren’t addicted? Why only 31 December? And why do you allow him to touch you after engaging in his disgusting habit. You are encouraging him. If you want him to stop you should be encouraging him to stop, not smoke with him.

Answer #2

I know that it is harmful, that’s why I want to stop. He knows the harms too but he doesnt want to stop. I dont know why he doesnt stop but I dont stop because it makes me feel good, unfortunately. I think if I stop on 31 december, I will start a new year, a new starting as a healthier person. By the way I dont think that I am encouraging him. He doesnt stop despite he knows that I dont want him to smoke and if he stops, I’m gonna %100 stop. But he doesnt stop and smokes next to me, so I want to smoke too.

Answer #3

Irene is correct… You are addicted to cigarettes, regardless of how many you smoke per day. One who is not addicted to smoking can stop smoking at any times. Many of my lecturers refer to how smoking addiction can be transmitted socially. If you normalise smoking and provide a supportive environment for your boyfriend’s smoking (e.g., by smoking with him), you will only further reinforce his smoking. You need to just stop smoking and then work with your boyfriend to stop him from smoking. Promote habits which inhibit his ability to smoke. Get him to chew gum, make him do jobs around the house where he needs to use his hands (so that he cannot be simultaneously holding a cigarette), put smoke alarms in the areas where he is likely to smoke, and so on. Create an environment unsupportive of smoking and you will find that his addictive behaviours will decrease slowly but surely.

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