Is it selfish for a girl to be upset when her boyfriend chooses his mother over her every time she calls?

whenever we are together his mother will call and say she wants him to do work for her, so he goes no questions asked and i’m so sick of being put second….

the thing is, I only see him MAYBE three times a week, but often times it’s only twice a week and it’s upsetting to hear “my mom wants me to do work for her so I’m staying home.” she sees him every day. he is in college, 18 so…. I don’t know. we’ve been going out for so long, and… I wish I’d be first.

no my bf used to do that for his sister. differnce was it was to babysit so she could go drinking. we pretty much raised that baby from 3 months to a year old. finally he broke down and told her no when she asked. now 2 years later she finally got help.

Hon, Let’s back up a bit. You want him to be with you at the hospital because your grandfather is ill. Ever occur to you that not (yet anyway) being a part of the family he would be awkwardly out of place? This sounds like a good call to me. If he is still living on his folks dime than he has to live by there rules and he has responsibilities to his own family. Are you sure that his folks are trying to keep you apart or are you just upset that he is busy with other obligations? Lets look at this from your BF’s point of view. Lets say his mom needs him to go up in the attic to carry down a heavy box. Do you really expect him to tell his mom that he can’t because he needs to hang out with his GF? You don’t want to get in a battle with his folks and make your BF choose between you and them. This is a loose-loose situation. If he drops you you loose your BF and if cause friction between him and his parents he will blame and resent you for it.

first of all sounds like she has issues with you…I say that because she always calls, according to what you have stated here, when she knows he is with you. Need to clarify that with him & then have hi,m clarify that with her! Secondly I think he doesnt hv a backbone because she see’s him daily & if he really wanted to be with you then he would say: “Mom, stop calling me to help out when out of the house!” Think about it…does he ever say that? No…What’s that saying? Mom first Everyone else after! Do you really want to be with someone that doesnt hv a backbone? If this is how things are now with you guys just dating, what will happen if someday you guys get more serious?

& When no gf should act up, you should always take family before gf nd what so ever. The gf can wait, like say yur grandpa is in the hospital nd hes in his death bed, thats the last time yur gonna see him, & your gf has the whole life to see your face :)

Yeah, it is selfish. Right now Im waiting for my boyfriend to come see me now that he’s finished helping his father do something, we were supposed to spend the whole day together yesterday, but he got called into work, which happens somewhat often, so today he was supposed to see me for the whole day, but his dad needed help, we havent seen eachother since monday, we usually only see eachother twice a week unless he has the weekend off, which only happens once a month. I have plenty of reasons to be pissed and hey, I am a little be irritated, but work and family are important. You cant tell your boss, sorry, sir, me and my girlfriend only see eachother a couple times a week, and you cant tell your father or mother, sorry, I want to hang out with my girlfriend, do it yourself. So, it is okay to be somewhat upset about it, because I know I am, but really, it’s nothing to be too angry about.

He is just answering his family member it means no harm to you.

No I don’t think so because your mother is your family and if hes still just your boyfriend then he aint family yet so… But if you dont have a close relation ship with your mom and a really good one with your boyfriend then have a quick convo with your mom then call your boyfriend back :)

hahahhahaha maybe he just wants to talk there is nothing selfish abt it….