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Is it mean or selfish of me to be upset?

Ok, my lil sis asked my mom to babysit her 2 toddler boys age 1 and 2. Mom said no she has to work. Mom said ask your sis. {this was last monday} she waited until about 9pm tonight to ask me if I would babysit from 9am to 7pm tomorrow. meanwhile I have 3 kids of my own to take care of, im a single disabled parent {all 3 of my kids have school on monday, we wake up at 5am. my question is…is it mean or selfish of me to be upset that she a) waited till the last minute to ask me, b) is wanting me to babysit for so long, and c} hep her kids up on m&ms and kool-aid while she is gone? I know mean right?

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Answer #1

thanks for your advice, but I meant that I hep her kids up on m&ms and kool-aid while SHE was gone. I only do that when she makes me babysit last minute notice, or if she doesnt come prepared. sometimes she is very forgetful. like not bringing a change of clothes, or enough diapers, or wipes. I wouldnt mind so bad if it was like once in a while…but with her its EVERY time

Answer #2

Why dont you just say no?

It’s not mean or selfish for you to be upset, it’s just a little pointless. The reason your sister waited the last minute to ask, and gave her kids all the sugar, is because she knew you might be upset, and you may or may not say anything, but at the end of the day you will still baby sit for her, and you’ll do it again next time. Even if she asks last minute and feeds her kids sugar. So you can be as upset as you want, but it isnt going to accomplish anything. Next time, lay down the law. Say no. Tell her you will not baby sit for her without advance notice, and when the kids are in your house, they will eat what you provide. She can be upset, and call you mean, and I’m guessing this comes from your family as well? But that’s ok. Apparently they’ve been treating you like a doormat for long enough. Time to stand up for yourself already. And that is NOT meanness. It isnt selfishness. it is simply saying I am a worthwhile person. I deserve to be treated with respect and consideration. If you do not treat me with respect and consideration, I will not do things for you. Or you can continue being upset.

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