What do you guys think of my poem so far?

I’m still working on it, though; I just need help with the second to last line…ahaha any suggestions?(: “First Fire”

“She looks down, feeling quite stupid. With hands balled into fists, she hated herself, hated him. She wished she could hide. How she longed to disappear.

She blinks back the hot tears that start to sting her eyes. Her cheeks start to burn, turning into a crimson red.

How could she have done this to herself? How could she have made herself so…vulnerable?

First fire. The first heat. The first flame of humiliation.

__. The first fire of having been rejected.”

Answer #1

The buring sinsation? if that helps or the pain make the fire burn black like carcoal. hope i helped -K-

Answer #2

Sounds really interesting…what about these…?

can try “bringing her down to her knees…”

can try “not a clue was detected…”

can try “the loudest cry of desperation..”

trying to help but we have a different style of poetry…hope these may help in some way!

Answer #3

sounds like when i was arrested and got maced E-Z on the eyes bro people want to feel it but not when it burns say Puffy or swollen not like the reign of fire

Answer #4

The inflamed words of suffercation

Answer #5

The torcher of ones dtermination

Answer #6

Way sudden as Spontanius combustion

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