What do you guy's think of this poem?

Death I Wish For. Death must be a beautiful experience So calm, so composed – the promise of permanence and certainty, hope of entry into an uncomplicated entity where company is available in plenty. Such whiteness, such calm and solace much unlike life on earth; if I ever had a chance to choose I would never have opted for such a life full of dearth. Heart breaks, tears, poverty, hunger, war, pressure, desperation and race these are the terms known to me because I am trapped in this mortal effigy, I envy the ones who are free from this numinous conspiracy i want to die and be forever free with you

Answer #1

um ok well i dont think you used some of your words correctly

Answer #2

Very gloomy, but the vocab was very well done and used. It like it, gj. It’s haunting.

Answer #3

Which words? I don’t see that D:

Answer #4

Sort of depressing but I like it :)

Answer #5

kinda dark, but i love it. keep writing! :)

Answer #6

Agreed with Connor…the words are fine - apparently it’s YOUR vocabulary that needs work.

Answer #7

I think you have definite potential, but I have a difficult time critiquing dark poetry….do you have anything light and happy?

Answer #8

Yeah i mean its good. but seems like ur depressed.. try writing bout flowers or love idk anything but that

Answer #9

kinda depressin.. but good :)

Answer #10

i do, i have many different poem’s sorts and i am a published poet as of a few months ago

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