I have a 17 yr. old daughter w/ a 14 month old daughter who wants to move out with her new boyfriend of 7 months. We have given her everything for her and our granddaughter and now because her boyfriend does not work he does farm chores and makes little pay under the table and it's not enough money to survive the real world and she's still in school taking her ged because he told her too. Please help. Don't know what to do, I took granddaughter to mall only for 1 hour and she yelled at me now will not let me babysit anymore...Now wants to move out for GOOD.. (boyfriend not the father of child)
I think you just have to let her go, she is obviously determined to do it and by trying to stop her will only make her resent you more.She is still young and she will realise after a short while that maybe its not as fun and as easy as she thought it would be. Its something that she has to experience and by her doing this it will make her realise just what a good support you were and how much you really helped her while she was living at home. Believe me, it wont be long until she will be ringing you up asking for your help, she will be missing her freedom and will soon realise that having a young child with her constantly without a break is not as easy as she might think it will be now. Hang in there and be there for her and support her and it wont be long until she will appreciate you and your help and maybe it will strengthen your relationship with her in the long run. good luck.
Hey im actually 18 and pregnant i understand were ur coming from and all n i understand how she feels... unfortunatly when i moved out i didnt go back but i deff can say dont push her away.. let her feel free and no that she can make her own dicisions,, dont demand or force her to do anything cuz my parents trying to control everything i did is what made me leave.. i ran away at 17 b4 my baby n they had me down as missing in action 4 a week tll i was arrested n brought home then i was on pined (person in need of supporvision.,.) i was then not allowed to leave while i was under aged.. even tho it seems like the parent now has control n make u stay its what made me run the minute i got freedom...
If you think the baby is in danger... and that they really will not financially be able to take care of it... neglect it... etc, then you should first make it clear to her what you think about the situation, how much you have done for her, and that she CANNOT possibly do it without your financial and moral support. (make sure she knows how much it is to take care of a baby-- I think nowadays its aroun $7,000/year) If she takes the baby and you feel the baby is not in good hands and really is in danger, than contact authorities and try to get an open adoption.
In a way I would like to say yes, let her go and discover what it's like to be an adult in a adult world, but in a way I would also like to say no. Because, it sounds like they are in a stage where they want to "play house"... and they don't realize what living alone at such a young age really contains. "They will have no freedom, cause there will not be a live-in-babysitter anymore, she will probably not finish school, and eventually, he will get tired of having a child around, and he'll probably leave your daughter with nothing.
So your daughter wants to move out with a boyfriend who is not the father of her daughter? If I were you, I would let her do it. She doesn't sound respectful to you and she may not even realize how much of a help you've been. As much as you love her, you should let her live on her own so she could see where she stands in this world. Don't offer her any more help unless she personally asks for it. She's the one who made a mistake; she's the one who's gonna fix it.
My older brother moved out around 17 - 19 years old. Hes doing just fine. He just got accepted a job application and makes good money. But then again.. hes 23 now. Even if your daughter is making a mistake she'll come back to you. For now, let her learn from her mistakes.
well thats a tough one well I would say if she's 17 then that's pretty young she should wait to move out at least another year that's my advice well hope you figure it out ok and good luck.
pooka
Just agree and let her move out. Once her boyfriend sees how hard it is to be without helpful support your daughter will realize she missed you and that it was easier when you were there to help her.
Yeah,I agree with xiigzag. Your daughter should know that you have been a help to her. Let her find out how she has to cope in the world without your help.
im 20 years old with a 2/12 year old son im doing great im going to school taking care of my son with we are doing great I moved out when I was 16
Yep. She's old enough to make mistakes, her situation is a testament to that. Let her do it, she'll be back...
i agrre with those other too she will come runnign back trust!!!
LET HER DO IT!! SHE CAN NOT BE HELD DOWN FOREVER.