Marriage to someone my family doesn't like

This is not an unusual situation citrus and there may be other members that could give you better advice than me based upon their own experience.

I can say that I have a female Vietnamese friend that has lived in Britain with her parents since she was two years old.

She was educated in Britain and grew up with British friends.

Her mother did not allow her to have boyfriends and was trying to arrange a marriage for her with another Vietnamese man.

My friend had a secret boyfriend for a year when she was 19 and they used to meet around my house while I was at work or out for the evening. Sometimes they would stay over.

They were clearly very happy with each other and very much in love. Her mother found out about the boyfriend and while they were around my house I had a group of 10 angry Vietnamese men (family friends and cousins etc) knocking on my door demanding that I sent her out to them so they could take her home to her parents.

I refused and there was a bit of a scene. (wont go into this as its not relevant) They finally drove away empty handed.

Her mother rang her to say that if she continued to see her boyfriend neither her family, her relative or the Vietnamese community would ever speak to her again.

For many months they lived in my spare room and we had a number of Vietnamese visit to try and make her go home.

She asked me what she should do. She wanted me to tell her to either stay with the guy or go home to her family, I explained that this was not for me to decide. All I could really say was that she needed to follow her heart.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, she married the guy 3 years ago, they have a beautiful baby boy with Vietnamese grandparents, relatives and the Vietnamese community totally accepting not only my friend, but also her husband. (This all happened about 8 months after the marriage and before she was pregnant.)

Everyone is talking to everyone again. His family are friends with her family. All of them sometimes visit my wife and I. My friend and her husband have their own house and are blissfully happy.

This is a totally true story and although this had a dream ending all round, everyones situation is different and do not always turn out like this.

Only you know your family and how you feel about them and your boyfriend. Only you know if your family is likely to accept him with time.

Try and find out why they dont like him, Maybe there is a genuine reason? maybe they just think you could do better?

Whatever the reason, it is your life and you need to live it in a way that makes you the happiest.

I can only advise you the same way as I advised my friend - Follow your heart.

I wish you happiness with whatever decision you make and apologies to other members for such a long and boring post.

:)