I would like opinions on my poem.

So I wrote this poem about a year ago and I am looking for people opinion on it. Thanks!

it all started out when I was just thirteen. I was picked on in school. the kids were so mean. they teased me and harassed with me and called me names. I really wasnt beat for their childish games. at home my parents fought all the time. my dad was always drunk and couldnt even walk a straight line. one day after school I went out with this guy. all we did was smoked weed because I thought it was fly. two weeks after columbine I was sick of theyre (the kids) sh*t. I told them I would kill them. I could no longer take it. one year later my dad passed away so I stayed high all the time poppin pills everyday. when I started poppin pills I finally felt ok. I knew that I needed them to make it through the day. little did I know at that point I was hooked. I didnt care about myself how I smelled or how I looked. when I was 15 my mom met this guy and just like that she started getting high. I took care of my brother for 3 long years. all I knew was sorrow pain and tears. then one day the sheriffs came to the door. the last time my mom paid rent was 3 months before. I moved in with my grandma and my mom went on the run til she got locked up and said she was done. she went to rehab and it didnt work. she was back on the run. she would steal and lurk. she went again. she was very skinny and lean but this time it was different. this time she stayed clean. when I turned 17 I met my babys dad. when he found out I was pregnant he got really mad. I had my twin boys when I was 18 years old. I started doing dope and DYFS (the state) was told. they took my boys when they were a year and a half old. after that everything I had was sold. all I wanted was more more more. til I sat nodding out. my head almost touching the floor. soon after that I started shooting coke. I never realized how serious it was. I took it for a joke. I was skitzin all the time. picking my face. soon after that I caught my first case. I got high and robbed a house. I was in and out quiet as a mouse. I got locked up but I didnt care. I was out a month later back in a stare. I was gettin that money out on the block. shootin the dope and smokin the rock. I never went back to court and I was on the run but I didnt care I was having my fun. I was in and out of rehab like a revolving door. I got tired of hearing them. they were such a bore. when I was getting high I got raped and got beat. I got clean for a minute just to get back on my feet. I overdosed 4 times and my heart stopped twice. sometimes it amazing how much you sacrifice. I ended up getting caught and I was back in jail. all my attempts to get out did nothing but fail. I was there for 5 months and then got paroled. I was tired of getting high. it got old. when I got out I relapsed real quick. I thought I could get away with it. I thought I was slick. I went to parole and admitted my use. thats the funny thing about drug abuse. if you wanna get high you just dont care. you think youll only use once so you take the dare. one is to many and a thousands never enough. but you take that first hit because you think you are tough. little do you know all it takes is one time. but after that one your anything but fine. youll con and manipulate. lie and steal. you try to play it off but everybody knows the deal. so get help for youself before its to late because if you dont death will surely be your fate. when you stay clean it opens new doors. just remember the choice is yours.

Answer #1

Ohh wow that’s a lot of stuff to happen in one life time lol.I Can’t write a poem rod my life

Answer #2

An amazing poem. You write very,very well.

Answer #3

That is really reallly good. That story part in it, is any f it true?

Answer #4

omg! this is awesome thank you sooo much for sharing this with us, if you dont mind I would like you to fun mail me and give me permission to use this as inspiration as well! you are such a great writter, and I am so glad you got help for yourself! if you would like any suport, just contact me via fun mail, ill be there. thank you Chynawhite. :)


Answer #5

Thank you all very much!

Answer #6

that was amazing. can you please funmail me your name bc I want to print this up and put it in my foom as insperation with your permission

Answer #7

The whole story is true. I had to write the story of my life for a project and I decided to write it in poem form opposed to writing it as a story.

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