I suffered a terrible 10 month pregancy. wont go into details. and 2 years on theres still not much of a bond between me and my 2 year old son. I love him very much and wouldnt be withou him but I want to know how to love/bond with him more/better? I also find it difficult to interact with him??? both of these issues really bother/worry me. any constructive advice would be much appreciated. no time wasters please, this is a serious life matter thats effecting the happinness of 2 people.
I look forward to hearing from anyone.
have you spoken to a medical professional?? first of all you are not the first and certainly not the last to feel this way... ist natural in some instances...but 2 years have gone by and you are still feeling this way... is the father in the picture if soo he needs to know you need support... and if no... than try and remember you are the only one this little one can depend on. skin to skin touch is also important for both mother and chlid in the early years...this makes the bond that will last till they are ready to ahve their own babies. ther are tones or self help books availiable in this genre...and if you need a break make sure you dont ignore the need and get someone to be with the babe while you take some desperately needed mommy time...\it will be ok... you will be ok... dont give up and seriously consider seeing your pediatrition. take care of you and your little one... and dont be ashamed just get help.
starlightlucy - I have just purchased Dr Phils book on family life and Dr Brazeltons book on child development I look forward to reading them, bought them on ebay last night. thanks for your advice hun.xxx
thelovedchild - thanks for the advice I happened to be in a charity shop yesterday and came across a mozart cd, so I left it on all nite for him in his room at a soothing volume. thankx again.xxx
and thanx to the rest of you too. much appreciated.
You sound like you're suffering from some sort of depression (not diagnosing online, but that would be my guess). Until you deal with the depression, teaching you how to interact with your child is not going to really help because that is not what your problem is. Depressed mothers often will not pick up cues from their children. Unless you've got some sort of developmental disorder where you have difficulty with communication and social relations, that's not going to help. You're missing them not because you dont know what they are, but because it very hard for you to pick them up in your state of mind. Depressed mothers will often also not maintain eye contact as much. And again, that is not because it is something you need to learn, but because when a person is depressed, they have a hard time interacting with others because it is so exhausting. There's a lot of things that you probably even wont notice you're not doing because of your mood. It is hard to learn how to do all these things if you're depressed. But, if you work on your depression, it should fix itself. For the sake of your child, consider actually getting help from someone who is working with an evidence based practice (I.e. there's research backing up their style of working)My 2-year-old son doesn't talk
think of your child hood give your son what you wanted...play with him comunicate and every night put on motes art he will grow up to be smart and you will be able to talk to him more often...Son is 2 years old he can say only 4/5 words
Dr Phil and Dr Brazelton have excellent books on this subject.Tips to help potty train my 2-year-old son?
awww I bet its just the terrible twos
ok this is what id do...
id spend as much time with him as possible. IE take him for a hours walk in the pram, or for that extra bond hold the lil fella for the hour during the walk... go to the local park with a ball and just pass it to each other
when hes playing on his own, join in and talk to him... I know his speach wont be very good but ask him about what s hes doin, whats he drawing and/or what he has named his toys...
when your talking to him make sure your looking at him, eye contact is a very good way for a parent and child to bond
when its time for his bed... or 30 mins before and hes been gd.. tell him hes been a gd boy and deserves a treat and that he can watch a cartoon for 30 mins before bed..
hope you know what im gettting at out of that :)my 2 year old son wont eat him self
Mozart do you mean? OK will try that.
thank you starlightlucy I will look if theres any on ebay or amazon.
very kind of you.