I Really want a baby

If you no longer have the boys, having helped raise your sister’s boys, you know that once you have a baby, time is no longer yours. It is best whenever possible to give you and your partner quality time alone together. How much time have you actually had to bond with him? Are you thinking of having a baby now only because you and your fiancé are alone together for the first time and you are uncomfortable with that? People who retire find themselves alone together after years of mostly doing their own thing and have to learn to be 24-7 with their partner again. Give yourself and your fiancé time to get adjusted to each other and you may find the joy that you have been missing since helping raise the boys will be found again in each others arms.

If you still have the boys, then it is a call between you and your partner. A child is not something you just decide to have. A child is for life. You will have to deal with not only the little one all your life, but will during the growing up time, have to deal with his father. If you two should split up for some reason, that only means he is not with you. You will still have to see him for the sake of your child together. It is something to make sure of that you are both ready to handle.

It is a big decision that perhaps you may want to wait till you are at least of legal drinking age which is 21 in most states. That’s when they think you are adult enough to handle alcohol. A baby seems even more reason to wait for maturity and readiness.

Anyway, that’s what I did. I was married at 18 and had my first child at 21. Back then I still wasn’t ready for the heavy responsibility even though like you I had experience with child raising having mostly raised my own sister’s child.

Once you and your partner are ready, God’s blessings! I know you will do your very best, have great children, and be wonderful parents! It’s the heart that wins. :)