Help me to stop fighting with every one please?

Okay well I have a lot to type so if you dont like reading dont try. My name is kyle me and my mom just had a big fight I was mad because she was tellin me to do sumthin I dont want to do. I know stupid argument. But while she was yellin. I dont yell. She said I was an irresponsible child who needs to learn a lesson from life. I believe differently I believe the way she was brought up by an abusive father is affecting the way she treats me. She is a very stubborn woman as I am a very stubborn teenager. And unlike my mother my father has never yelled at me and for that I respect him more then I do my mother. I don’t know why I said that but I did. But any way back to what I was saying after my mom started yelling at me I realized I dont need to take this crap and I pushed her she slapped me. I do believe I deserved it. But after that she started yelling at me louder and louder so I just left she hasnt bothered me yet but I know she will soon. But I need to know how to control my anger better and how to stop fighting with my mom the normal advice doesnt work here “do what she tells you to do” if I do that then she yells at me for doing it wrong. The only reason I havent just left from my house “ran away” is because my father he fought in vietnam and im sure I wouldnt be able to take his punishment. Well yea that is all I have to say so please I need an answer soon.