How can I gain my mum's trust?

As i said on my last question. It’s my boyz b-day friday and I really want to go I haven’t being able to see him for a couple of weeks now :( but my mum does trust me about the whole thing I’ve told her I would contact her when I can. That I’m in a biggish group when we go out. and That I possible will be able to stay at his the night . But she still wont allow me to. she always says she wanted a better life for me and my brothers and sister but when ever me or one of my brothers want to go out she never lets us, and I don’t see how that is fair they know I’m responsible and wont don’t anything i shouldn’t. so i need help on how to gain my mums trust that nothing will go wrong by this Friday. please?!?! anything

Answer #1

Not to be a downer, but the best way to gain your mom’s trust and respect would be to do as she says. I, on the other hand, lie when I wanna go somewhere. This isn’t the greatest advice, but I figure I know right from wrong and would say something if something went wrong.

Honestly, your mom is only trying to watch out for you, but I understand how you feel not being able to see your boyfriend.

Another suggestion would be for him to visit you. This way your mother would feel comfortable knowing where you are and you could see him.

Answer #2

I accidentally pressed enter.

If you truly cannot wait and none of the suggestions I gave earlier are helpful, then have your mother call him. Make an arrangment to where your mother will know of the supervision that will take place when you are at the party.

Answer #3

Have him come over, or make sure your mom is aware that you’re making good decisions, and if you have to exaggerate that in front of her. My parents are very strict so I lie when I want to go somewhere I know they wouldn’t approve, but it’s up to you. For the most part my parents have no idea what I’m doing though, but I don’t want you to go behind their back if you’re not comfortable. Sucking up also works, and maybe just reassuring them that you will be fine and make good choices even if you dont. Good luck!

Answer #4

thanx for the advice, and yeah iv’e have gone behide their back once or twice but i was hoping I wouldn’t have to again but it looking like my only option and I would have him come to me but he has mates going as well. not just me and him. so that wont work :(

Answer #5

Maybe talk to her and explain to her you won’t do anything she wouldn’t approve of and if she says no maybe ask if she trust u or not or even why u can’t go. I had a problem where my mom wouldn’t let me go see a movie with my bf alone. I said to my mom it seems like you don’t trust me but how am I ever suppose to prove myself if u don’t give me a chance to. I think you should talk if talking doesn’t work maybe get ur bfs mom to talk to her? Get your bf to come over and show her that u don’t do anything wrong. You just need to prove to her. Hope this is some what help! Its hard to say cuz every parent u need to show them in a different way to gain trust .

Answer #6

yeah i know what you mean, and my mum doesn’t really want me even having a boyfriend lol cause she thinks im too young. and I’ve tryed talking to her about it i told her nothing will do wrong and that ill contact her. and I’m not sure if his mum would come down cause she really striked too so I dont really see a way out :(

Answer #7

Oh that sucks. I honestly think parents shouldn’t say one is to young or not cuz it really depends if ur ready. I think when ur more strict on a child they are more likely to disobey. Like for me my mom was so strict on me to a point I would lie to do things and just did them. I told her if u trusted me and let me do stuff then I wouldn’t have to lie about it. I also just ignored what she said and did it! Now she doesn’t really argue with me about stuff but its different cuz I’m 18 soon and I have hardly any control over my life. I don’t suggest u do what I did it causes many fights. :( I wish I could help . If sucking up works for her do it if it doesn’t then don’t cuz that could make things worst!

Answer #8

Well you have to consider the fact that you are only 14 and at 14 you do not have the ability to think as clearly as an adult nor are you as responsible as one either, that isnt just an opinion but the magic age of 18 is backed scientifically by brain functioning and reasoning skills. Letting a child(anyone under 18) spend the night with the opposite sex that is not a relative would be a poor choice on your mothers behalf and she is only trying to do what is best for you even if you or your peers think differently. Listen to your mom, she loves you and is trying to do what is best for you and she wont be around forever. Feel blessed that you do have a mother that cares and respect and help her as much as you can.

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