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finally giving up, but why?? why?? did "he" hear my prayer??

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I'm moving on, for more than 4 years, I've been praying, praying for the one that is in my heart and in my head everyday, he was on drugs and I believe my prayers and his moms helped him get out of them, but I also asked to be there and help him, because I still love him, but since he hurts me so much I am finally letting go, but why?? why?? I wanted to be there, and he loved me too, he told me he did, but why?? if I'm a good girl, I'm 24 years old, I was truly in love!! my heart felt like it was bursting when we were together, why??