Will my boyfriend eventually become abusive? Should I be afraid?

I can tell you in most cases it slowly does turn in to that im still in that situation you think it will get better but it never does it starts with that and goes to your not going there or doing this then its the whole making you feel shitty about your self every chance they get and eventually it can definitly lead into abuse if you let them get away with that it doesnt change and it doesnt get better…I had a kid to one of them people..think about it if your questioning it then your oviously feeling uncomfortable about the situation get out of this situation…

honey its NOT him fealing insecure-its him being controling.controling,possesive and jelous behavour only gets worse trust me. I was in an abusive relationship for 3 1/2 years,so I do know.thats how it started out.its so not worth it.I know its mean but but I totaly regret every min I spent with him,even though I loved him at the time. you can do so much better,you dont deserve that kinda crap! funmail me if you need help.take care beag xxx

I dont think you sould go as far as abusive but think would you want him to be soo controling for the rest of your life and if its that bad now it will only get worse…my suggestion is get away for him because that is not healthy for you and will only make your life bad…and if you are so crazy about him that your not gonna break up with him then you need to get him some help or tell him that you cant take that anymore…THATS REDICULIOUS!! (dont know how to spell sorry)

I asked this question somewhere else and got this answer: Oh, no no no no NOooo! This is NOT about his insecurity, my dear - he’d like you to feel sorry for him and have you think that it is just some little insecurity. It is not. This is about control. He is controlling you - he will call you when he gosh darn good and well gets around to it, 5 hours later, and he can go and do whatever he wants, and step out on you,…but YOU are supposed to be there hanging on his every word or he will go bananas and call you every minute?!! Not right! It is more than that he doesn’t trust you - he doesn’t see you as being entitled not to be under his complete control, to do ANYTHING that he does not permit you to do..

That is a huge red flag for abuse. Because being controlling and being abusive are closely related. He already IS possessive - what part of this aren’t you getting yet? We can’t tell you exactly what he will do, if you don’t call back right away - but let me ask you, you clearly already know that there is something not right about this relationship. I am sure that there are other red flags for controlling behavior coming from him, or you wouldn’t be asking this question. Why would you want to stick around and find out what he will do next? And do you think it is okay for him to control you, isolate you from your friends and family, take away every last spark of independence you ever had, and make you think that you are crazy, as long as he doesn’t hit you? What he is doing now is how it starts - sometimes it just stays this way, other times it gets physical faster. Either way, it is still abusive, and it sucks your soul away from you. You should leave NOW while you still have a molecule of self esteem. Don’t let it go any further. RUN, now! Be prepared that if you break up with him, he will probably get stalkerish, and call you a bazillion times and spew venomous statements at you. If you have the good sense to break up with him (which I earnestly hope you do), then do NOT keep taking his calls or talking to him. All you need to do is to tell him that you are no longer interested in any kind of a relationship with him, you are not angry with him, but your relationship is at an end, and you are not interested in continuing any kind of friendship, either. Give him his stuff, if you have anything of his that belongs to him, but make sure that you do the exchange in a public place with other people accompanying you for protection, and do NOT talk to him ever again. Block his calls if you need to.

After reading that I am seriously considering doing exactly what he said to do- break up with him. I like him, but not enough to stay with him. We have only been together for a month. We are pretty much cool other than this. We see each other like 3 or 4 times a week, we go out on the weekends. He’s nice to me, and when I tell him he does something I dont like he fixes it. I have told him about not answering my calls, and thats one thing that hasnt got better. I do often feel like he feels like everything has got to be on his time.

I dont know if I really believe he would be physically abusive, but one can never know. He seems to have a good relationship with his mother, and his sisters. But hell I think not answering my calls and calling me back hours later is abuse enough! I like being happy, and when something/one makes me unhappy I get rid of them. I do know my worth and date tons of awesome guys. He’s just one… and I know that

If I see him today, I’ll talk to him, and tell him how I feel. Then if he still isnt answering my phone calls and calling me like that I will break up with him on Friday. He’s got 3 days. I feel like a freakin idiot for even being involved with something like this!