how to stop hating myself and live at least a normal life? I need help.

Let me just get one thing clear. I am not normal, I am a total weirdo and if you’re just gonna hate and not give me constructive advice, then don’t answer.

I’m 13, I have only ‘close’ friend who I kind of strongly dislike too often for my liking but she doesn’t know ( yeah, yeah I’m a bitch). I’m awfully disorganized and though I’ve made schedules, task lists , bought planners and shit like that, I can’t seem to get organized.

I hate my body and my face to be honest more often these days and feel gross when I look at them. I seem to repell people and don’t make friends easily. God, very few people talk to me in school like in a friend way and that bothers me, but I push away the two girls who are nice people and friends of mine.

I hate it when I cry and often hit myself on the head repeatedly if I do. And I fantasize about cutting myself and sometimes dream up different ways to kill myself. (I’ve recently became interested in the idea of sticking my head in a oven and inhaling plenty of carbon monoxide.) And those are only a fraction of the details of my useless and miserable life. By the way, I don’t believe I’m depressed. I think I’m a self-pitying bitch, but I don’t want to be like that anymore. Any tips on how to be a nice, neat, organized and normal person would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

Answer #1

I was a social pariah growing up; even most of the unpopular kids wouldn’t hang with me. I was bookish, socially awkward, overweight and bad at team sports. I used to say the wrong thing so often that we joked that the only time I opened my mouth was to change feet. The thing is that things will get better. Lots of the popular kids and the kids who bullied me peaked in high school and their lives have been train wrecks ever since. I on the other hand managed to get a clue how to get along with people and eventually found people that instead of just thinking of me as weird thought of me as interesting (and weird but they are weird too). There have been some rocky years but overall now I have a pretty good life, a career that gets me by without making me miserable and a family I adore. 13 is way too young to give up. Sometimes it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel but things did get better for me and I’ll bet that they will get better for you too. You don’t need tips on being a nice, neat, organized normal person. Believe you me, forcing yourself to be something you are not is its own kind of Hell. No doubt you will need to smooth some of your rough edges but you should embrace the snarky, messy, disorganized, abnormal person you are. You do need to find a way to fit in with everyone else but don’t become them.

Answer #2

your so lucky im soppost to be “nice”…

Answer #3

Well that makes us two weirdos :) haha.My life was like that when i was your age too.everything was confusing.but best thing i can tell you,ignore the haters and welcome the nice ones that you meet,All are not the same.No one will make you happy like you do.dont hate your self.you do not deserve that.you have ups and down,thats all.you should make hobbies and do your fav things at time like this.if it’s the school then take one off and do what you want.give your self time to enjoy.dont stress.do your best,and forget the rest.thats the way i have made my self stand.at time of the day try doing meditation.turn on some caaalming music just take deep breaths,and see your life circuling around.in this state ask yourself what do you want,umm like may be its time i forget about other people and be the way i want.aproach the people that care about you and ignore the others.they dont deserve your time.i hope you are good soon.remember do your hobbies because you need to give your self time to enjoy and only you.hope things get better for you soon.just have positive thoughts.good luck :)

Answer #4

Thanks for the replies, they made me smile. :) I’ll follow the suggestions and just see how it goes

Answer #5

You are welcome :) that is why FunAdvice community is here for.glad we made you feel a lil better and sounds you are happier than the last time.funmail us anytime you need or ask it on a question,we will be there :).wish you the best!!

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