Potty training

I work with a little boy who has been diagnosed on the Autistic spectrum, is going to be starting school in 4 months, and he’s still not toilet trained either. Some children learn later than others, and that’s perfectly fine, but when you’re getting as close to the wire as my employer and I are, it’s easy to get frustrated! Here’s a few things we’re trying currently:

Making sure we use language that shows toileting is normal- we don’t use words like ‘yuckky’ or ‘gross’ when referring to waste products. We can describe them as ‘sticky’ or ‘hard’ and sometimes ‘smelly’, but we never show disgust when using those words. I know it seems a bit hard, but using simple descriptive words can take away a child’s possible anxiety.

A motivator when I sit the boy in question on the toilet is I tell him to ‘push his tummy’. He knows to squeeze his tummy muscles in as part of using the toilet now, and a gentle reminder sometimes helps.

Sometimes children are scared they will hurt themselves when going to the toilet. The children I work with usually have a fruit smoothie at about lunchtime, sometimes made with a bit of prune juice to get things moving.

PULL UPS! These may be coming forward in leaps and bounds with absorbancy, drawing the fluid away, etc, but it’s a nightmare for toilet training! Nine times out of ten, it’s all too comfortable for the kid to stay in the wet nappy. A suggestion I heard was putting your child in cotton underpants, with a pull up overtop. That way, when they do have an accident, they can feel they are wet, and you don’t end up having to change their clothes all day.

Reading books about toilet training can be a good way to motivate your child. One of the best stories I’ve heard is one called “Nappy Duck and Potty Pig” by Bernette Ford and Sam Williams. It’s witty, short, and has very simple language that young children understand.

Reward charts work well too. Sometimes a sticker can do the trick well, as it’s a small, immediate reward the child recognises and feels proud of (accompanied by lots of praise, hugs and kisses of course!). Sometimes you can tell the child ‘If you can do your poo in the toilet every day for a week, you can have…’ it might be a small treat, or a trip to the park, a small toy… use your imagination, and make sure it’s something you know the child will like. Using a calendar, whenever they achieve the goal for the day, let them stick the sticker on the calendar, so they can see the progress they’re making, and feel like it’s their hard work paying off.

And of course, as most people have said, patience and persistence- it’s not an easy task, but keep at it, and don’t be discouraged. All the best!