Why is it people say I am helpful yet I feel so worthless?

Answer #1

Feelings of worthlessness stem from within. Do you mean you feel worthless in that what you do/ say does not help someone, even though they say it does? If so, realise that all you can really do for someone is be there for them. By all means give advice if they ask, but as long as you are there so they can talk and they know you support them, then you are being nothing but worthwhile and an amazing friend. If they say you are helping then believe them, because you will always wish you could do more. In reality it is often not the case though and all you can do is be there for them.

If you feel worthless in general then that might indicate an underlying disorder like depression or anxiety. If you regularly feel this way then it is worth seeing a doctor and having a chat with them about it as they may be able to refer you to counselling to help your self esteem, or maybe even diagnose you with something if you have other symptoms too.

Answer #2

It’s because something is making you feel like what you’re doing isn’t right or that it has no impact on others. Perhaps you feel like you’re not as helpful as others think you are, or as great as they think?

I can’t tell you the exact reason you’re feeling this way, but this is something YOU can think about. So.. When people say this, why is it that you feel you’re not as helpful or great as they think? Try to think of some reasons, and include any negative factors from other sources (ex: are others saying nasty things to you?).

Answer #3

i was already diagnosed with depression and i hate doctors

Answer #4

That is probably why then- it is a very common symptom of depression. Just realise that as long as you try your best, then you are not worthless at all and are doing all you can.

Maybe check out my howto on depression if you want and see if it helps at all, as you don’t need to go to the doctors to help treat depression if you do not want to: http://www.funadvice.com/howto/diagnose_handle_depression

Answer #5

you know why you feel that way…because you cant find it in yourself to forgive yourself for feeling vulnerable for something that occurred in your life which caused your depression in the first place. The first place is healing that then working your way up to why you feel worthless. Forgiving is the hardest part. Admitting that you need learn how to forgive is the first step to healing… If you feel so crappy about doctors, then find a workshop so its not a one on one session but a group thing.

Just remember baby steps my dear. hope this helps.

Answer #6

great AA all over

Answer #7

if it is what you need then do it…dont you owe it to urself to live & be happy rather then merely settle for less by surviving & being content?! Dont you want to feel worthy & proud…do it for yourself because you are worth it…and can be all that you want to be…just reach out for it cuz it aint gonna come to you!

Answer #8

I felt the same way like you, I am great a 120 people in my officer confise in me and trust me with the lives both personal and business. Yet i feel worthless and like i am not making a difference. Yet i realised i was unhappy for a long time simply unhappy that is it , forget about experiences and depression and stress thos are all words people use when they dont know what is wrong with you, you are propable simply unhappy, so try and find ways to cheer yourself up to be happy to feel energetic, trust yourself beleive in yourself, no one can proof wring what you already know is right. Have some fun, do some stuff you would not normally do for example if you dont like science fiction hire a science fiction watch it with the sound really loud and just start to enjoy it have more fun.

Answer #9

Yes, if you can identify what gives you joy and do that more to cheer yourself up, that’s very good.

Answer #10

Here are a couple of good things to remember about feelings:

  1. They pass. Whatever we are feeling at any given moment, it seems like it will last forever - we could always be this happy (and then it feels like a crash when we’re not anymore), or we will never get out from under this cloud (until the next thing that unexpectedly lifts our spirits). But to the extent that we let ourselves feel them, our feelings constantly shift - from month to month, from occasion to occasion, from moment to moment. That’s why we call them emotions. They are able to move much more freely when we don’t try to turn away from them to avoid the pain, but hold our attention gently on them and let them move through us, say what they have to say to us, and pass.

  2. Did you ever feel cold when you knew it wasn’t really so cold because no one else around you felt that way? That’s because feeling something doesn’t make it true. Emotions can be the same way. You can feel afraid because of a memory, or an odor, even when there’s no real threat present. Just because you have a feeling of worthlessness, that doesn’t mean that you are worthless. When some feeling is clamoring for your attention it may tell you all kinds of nonsense about yourself. Give it the attention it wants (then it won’t have to clamor so much), but don’t let it fool you; remember what is true: You are fun, you are talented, you are a warm loving person who cares about others - human or nonhuman, you are creative, funny, and smart as a whip, you are beautiful, you are strong - you broke your addiction, you make a difference for other people, your artwork moves and inspires them. You are cherished by people who love you, who care deeply about you, who want to support you. You are one of the many unique points of light through which the cosmos has come to know itself. You are worthy.

  3. We all have conflicting feelings; different parts of us feel differently even at the same time. When part of you feels worthless, there is another part that wants to help and to heal. You can choose which you want to identify with. Instead of taking the part that feels worthless to be who you are, you can relate to that part the way you would with a hurting friend. Embrace it, soothe it, be there for it, protect it. Listen to it.

I wish you all the best, Stasha.

Answer #11

People say you’re helpful probably because you are. I’m sure you are a wonderful person. Feeling worthless is a mental state rather than something based in truth. You are depressed. I know because it takes one to know one.

See a doctor (psychiatrist) or psychological counselor.

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