How can I help my living environment?

Hello, Last time I had a problem, it was my sister being a 1st class bully BIG TIME! Now I realize that it’s because of my parents. About 2 months ago, my sister left a friend’s house to go to another friend’s house without a phone and never told us where she was going. She didn’t get back home until the next morning, and when she got home, she had about 5 hickies on her neck from her 17 yr old b/f (She will be 14 in September).

Now, there’s an 18 yr old guy from Detroit (we live in Nevada) living with us. I have no idea how my sister originally met him. He is very rude to others, have a depression problem, and no self respect. He claims he works for Microsoft, but had to have a friend send him money because he was broke. When out in public, he wears a chain choke collar around his neck with a chain leash connected to it, demanding that my sister has to hold on to his leash ot else he’ll run away. He refuses to go by any other name than Puppy.

I might be able to handle that, but he’s living in our house, in my sister’s room! She’s 13 years old, he’s 18 years old, and they are sleeping in the same bed. When they are awake, they are always hanging on each other. (He claims he’s homosexual.) I can’t believe my parents are letting this happen! I was talking to some other people and they think that my parents could go to jail for even letting him sleep in the same bed as her because she’s so underage.

Can someone help me here? I am looking for a place on the internet that would talk about that so I can get more information about it. I have had many people tell me that I just need to get out of the house because it’s really awful. My sister and her “not boyfriend” are running the place! My parents have no control over either of them and won’t do anything about it. Please please please help me. Thanks

P.S. (Added June 9) I am the only LDS member in my household. So I am the only one with religious background and rules for myself. No one else in the house even goes to any church. Thanks

Answer #1

Wow, that’s awful. Thanks for updating us. Are things going well with this other family so far?

Answer #2

Yes, this other family is working out. I was the only one in my family who went to church at all. However, on Sundays, I would just spend the day with this other family, and we joked around saying that they just kinda adopted me. Now I’m the only female in the house (besides the mom), and things are good. I actually interact with my new “siblings” and we all get along. It’s good. I’m hoping to get married in January, and I’ll move to Arizona at that time.

Katrina (LDSMous)

Answer #3

idsmous tha best thing that i can tell u to do is pray baby gurl, well let me tell u one thing about ya living enviroment before long so one is going to snitch on ya parents and then they are going to be in big trouble for letting a 13 year old sleep, hold on not only sleep, but see each otha, they r facing some serious charges and they donf’t even know, probably don’t care, but if ya’ll had any descpline ya parents would know that is the wrong move, they must want her to have a baby at this age, and they can’t faught anybody, but their selves, but u need to seek help before u r emotionally abused and they keep taking advantage of you and ya pride, u did the right thing about seeking help mama, but what ya parents r letting go down is redicilous and they need to be punished, cause all dey doing is ruining ya little sistah life, and they let her grow up to fast, and to soon and if it continues then they r going to have a grandbaby pretty soon, if she aint already pregnant, well u know the saying when you know betta u do betta, well ya parents don’t know betta, so they can’t do betta, cause if they did then they would not let what is going down go down, ya dig well u did right to seek help for ya family and ya self, especially for ya sistah and ya parents,cause something is seriously wrong with them in order to let their daughter shack up in their house and she only 13 years old, well fun mail any tyme when you need to talk

Answer #4

idsmous tha best thing that i can tell u to do is pray baby gurl, well let me tell u one thing about ya living enviroment before long so one is going to snitch on ya parents and then they are going to be in big trouble for letting a 13 year old sleep, hold on not only sleep, but see each otha, they r facing some serious charges and they donf’t even know, probably don’t care, but if ya’ll had any descpline ya parents would know that is the wrong move, they must want her to have a baby at this age, and they can’t faught anybody, but their selves, but u need to seek help before u r emotionally abused and they keep taking advantage of you and ya pride, u did the right thing about seeking help mama, but what ya parents r letting go down is redicilous and they need to be punished, cause all dey doing is ruining ya little sistah life, and they let her grow up to fast, and to soon and if it continues then they r going to have a grandbaby pretty soon, if she aint already pregnant, well u know the saying when you know betta u do betta, well ya parents don’t know betta, so they can’t do betta, cause if they did then they would not let what is going down go down, ya dig well u did right to seek help for ya family and ya self, especially for ya sistah and ya parents,cause something is seriously wrong with them in order to let their daughter shack up in their house and she only 13 years old, well fun mail any tyme when you need to talk

Answer #5

Just an update. I had told enough people about it, that someone called CPS. CPS came by when my mom was sleeping, so they had to come the next day, but told her what time they would be there and the whole contents of the call they received. So she was able to clean the house up and make a story to cover everything up. There was a rumor going around the house that my mom was going to say that the 18 yr old was my boyfriend (I’m engaged to a 22 yr old in AZ), and that I was only renting a room. To cover all my bases, I called CPS myself to tell them my side of the story and to warn them of the lies that may or may not be told to them. Once they talked to my mom, she figured out that I had called at least once, got upset and kicked me out of the house. So now I am living with a church family of mine full-time and my mother won’t even talk to me, let alone want to see me. Just thought you’d like an update.

Answer #6

My guess is that there is a strong “LDS” presence in the house? This is not an uncommon thing in religious households for children to act out against the parents belief structure. Teenagers are difficult enough to get on the right path, but you add a serious set of rules like religion and you get a recipe for disaster.

I remember some of the wildest girls I knew in High School were Jehova’s Witnesses. Some of the “born again” girls I knew fell for the worst guys seemingly because they were “bad-boys”. It seems that the harder you push someone at that age, the higher the possibility that they will go and do the most extreme opposite thing that the parents want or believe. The only place I have seen parental moral pressure work has been in Disney movies and Disney owned network TV.

There isn’t much to do for this situation. Your parents do need to set a stronger set of rules down though. Fear of losing a child to the pressures of life shouldn’t dictate your household. Kick the guy out, ground the girl for the partying, and instill the fear of God in any young man that gets near the young women.. At least that is what I would do.

Answer #7

call social services about your parents allowing an 18 yo to share a bed with your 13 yo sister.

Answer #8

I’m sorry that you’re having to deal with such things, (I’ve been in a similar spot), and that you’re mom is doing what she is. I still think you did the right thing, and I glad some church friends are supporting you.

Answer #9

That sounds like a pretty awful situation. The other people might be right; your parents might be able to get into some trouble for that. They really need to put their foot down. It’s their house, not hers.

You could always call Child Protective Services to see what they have to say and if they want to look into it before your sister ends up with some serious problems on her hands. http://dcfs.state.nv.us/DCFS_ChildProtSer.htm

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