How to discipline a 3-year-old?

I bribe and threaten. When I first enter the store, I let my 4 and 3 years old girls, get one of their favorites snacks. I put it in the basket and the entire time we are in the store I keep saying if you want that snack you must keep quiet and behave. If the act up and throw a fit I take the snack and put it on the shelf. If it gets loud and out of control I threaten time out as soon as we get home. I stick to my threat. If I say I will put the snack back I do it. If I say you get one more chance I give one more chance. I must admit however, I frequent stores with the car basket (Kroger or HEB) so that they are entertained. If not I use the treat method. As soon as we arrive, before getting out the car I say, “Who wants a treat?”, I listen and I let the specify one treat, (donuts, a candy, cookie, or popsicles). That’s when I make it clear, “ Ok only good girls get a treat, if you act up mommy will not buy the snack. It works more often than not.

I bribe and threaten. When I first enter the store, I let my 4 and 3 years old girls, get one of their favorites snacks. I put it in the basket and the entire time we are in the store I keep saying if you want that snack you must keep quiet and behave. If the act up and throw a fit I take the snack and put it on the shelf. If it gets loud and out of control I threaten time out as soon as we get home. I stick to my threat. If I say I will put the snack back I do it. If I say you get one more chance I give one more chance. I must admit however, I frequent stores with the car basket (Kroger or HEB) so that they are entertained. If not I use the treat method. As soon as we arrive, before getting out the car I say, “Who wants a treat?”, I listen and I let the specify one treat, (donuts, a candy, cookie, or popsicles). That’s when I make it clear, “ Ok only good girls get a treat, if you act up mommy will not buy the snack. It works more often than not.

I love this Do I have this problem yes and wow , its like all of yours and mine rolled into on problem. I’ll post replies to anything that works since I just signed up for the site today.

Sue has some very good advice there. However I like the idea of not buying them sweets etc unless they have been good. If you let them have your attention whilst your child is having a tantrum, they like it and they will do it everytime.

All you need to do it grip him by the arm the moment he starts throwing one. Tell him in a stern voice “Stop it, mummy’s shopping”… he will carry on obviously by being a child. The next time he annoys you, you ignore him. Do not even look at him, carry on what you came out to do. If any candy is placed in your basket by him, you take it out and put it on the shelf. Keep doing it if he keeps putting it back in. Do not speak to him or even give him a glance. Children are quick with their eyes… they know when you are looking. If people are looking at you in the store, ignore them because you came out to do shopping not to be judged.

If he tries to run off, be quick with your actions and like another advice mentioned, tell him that is it, we are going home. No candy, no food, no nothing. Strap him into the carseat and take him home and send him to his room - make sure he cannot play with his toys.

I know when you go shopping you will need the supplies, so I would suggest you get someone else to do it if you have resorted to going home from a shop with nothing or get someone to look after him while you do it in peace. Other options is to shop online.

my son is 2 and he would scream and throw a fit every time I went into a store. I do believe in spanking but in stores it just doesn’t work with my son. he just screams louder. i have tried to just ignore him and taking him out of the store completely. I have also tried taking him into the bathroom at the places we are at. lately it seems like he just wants to struggle with me for power. so when he is in the front of the cart and he starts his acting up i go into a quiet place in the store (like a corner where there isn’t alot of people and i just grab both of his wriists with my hands and hold them down on his lap so he cannot move. by this poing he is screaming very loudly. then i tell him to listen and in between him screaming and catching his breath i tell him i will let go of hom when he stops screaming and tell him we can go back to shopping when he closes his mouth. this has worked for me for like 2 weeks until the other day. So bottom line i don’t think sticking to one punishment works with every kid, I try one and if it doesn’t work i go to the next one. if none of them work i just let him scream until he falls asleep. or I pull all my hair out–whatever comes first!!

hi i no i am only 15 but i no how to look after kids…have you used the naughty step routine? depending on there age they have to sit on the step (called naughty step) and dont talk to them untill time is up.. ofr there is taking away there toys and telling them if they have been good.they get them back.,! hope this helped..

Dear chuguley, A child will show a great display in a public place because they think being in public you will give in to them to make sure they don’t act up. This is were you surprise them. When your child has a tantrum in a public place be prepared to leave. You pick the child up and tell them we are going home. This means leaving your purchases behind or a meal in a restaurant. This may take a few goes but soon they will realize they have no power over you. But you must be consistent and do it every time there is a tantrum in public. Failing to do this will result in several steps back and it will take months to correct. Sue…good luck

my son is 2 1/2 I will sit him on the floor for a time out he will scream a little bit but it will pass then when he calm down tell him that you didn’t like what he did works for me

give him or her a short time out NEVER hit them tell them no… or don’t act like that don’t let them play their favorite game for a day

im just a kid but when i was 3or 4 yrs old my mom would grip me up and say “quit it “ and wouldn’t buy me candy or rewarded me when i was good

…regarding what?

Well I feel like you don’t have to spank your child but if he/she is throwing a tantrum in the store it is ok to smack there hand and tell them stop in a stern voice if your child is aware that you mean bussiness even at the age of three they will try to calm down and it is very important that you keep your kid under control cuase things can become very unorganized and stressful