How do you love yourself and not feel you are ugly?

How do you gain the feeling that you are not ugly? That you are worth something and that you have a purpose? I dotn need the biblical stuff I am not into the biblical answers. I am tired of feeling like the ugliest and fattest woman on earth. I do yes have a boy friend but him telling me that I am great doesnt seem to help. I feel he sees me through rose collored glasses, either that or he himself doesnt have the heart to tell me the truth. I feel ugly as hell and cant get passed it, any advice?

Answer #1

ugly is a meaningless word, and a term people should redefined. I mean not having hips, or being overweight or not having enough breast makes you ugly?, think about how the concept of beautiful and ugly changes with culture, through time, countries, etc. some people think is beautiful if you have million of piercings, if you have this or that hairstyle, if you have a wonderful soul, etc.

The truth is Beauty is in eye of the beholder, people who loves you already sees it. It s just time that you can see it too, you are perfect and unique the way you are, thats what makes each of us beautiful. So do yourself a favor stop listening to this media, and think that only skinny people or flawless skin people are beautiful. stop comparing yourself with others. Find your qualities and be proud of what you have to offer to this world.

If you really take a time to find yourself, you would be amazed to find out how incredible each of us are.

Answer #2

All you need to do is just think positive and not negative. Like when you wake up in the morning, just tell yourself that you are beautiful. And if someone calls you ugly, don’t let it get to you and hurt you. You need to gain your self esteem back. That is what I do. It helped me a lot. Try that!!

Answer #3

as for your boyfreind im sure he thinks that your beautiful im sure he wouldnt say it unless he meant it…as for the not loving yourself part there is nothing actually wrong with you I think all us girls go through that and you will most definatly get over it

Answer #4

Self love and self acceptance are things you acquire over time. Think of it like a journey: you’ve got to take the steps to get to where you want to go.

Naturally, we all look at ourselves the most critically. We’re constantly looking in the mirror saying ‘I need to lose a few pounds around the waist’, ‘ugh, my spots are revolting’, ‘what is going on with my hair?!’ etc. It’s not often we find ourselves looking and saying ‘Wow- you look really great today!’

First things first- you need to identify things you like about yourself. I’m not just talking physically, I’m talking inside and out. Make a list with the things you like, for example:

~My eyes ~My ability to stay calm ~My loyalty ~My bust ~My career prospects etc

Then make a list of all the things you want to change, realistically. For example, if you want to lose weight around the tummy region, don’t say “get liposuction”, especially if you know it’s never going to happen. Take a positive step, and google or look up some good daily meal plans for a balanced diet, with veges, fruit, dairy, meat, grains, etc. While you’re at it, look for exercises that tone your mid section, like crunches, or a bunch of swiss ball exercises. Swiss balls are relatively cheap, and they get results. Don’t rule out treats every now and again, because if you cut them out entirely, you’re more likely to fall off the rails. Make an exercise plan and stick to it! It only needs to be 30 minutes a day. Also, go out there, and if you can, pick out a few new clothes that flatter you. If you don’t have a lot of money, maybe you can swap some of your old clothes with a friend.

Your boyfriend loves you for who you are. Trust me, if he really loves you, he wouldn’t care if you’re a size 6 or a size 16. My partner has seen me as a stick figure and a fuller figure, and he loves me all the same. It may seem like a biased opinion, but it’s often true. Would he be with you if you were as ugly and worthless as you imagine you are? That’s got to say something about how hard you are on yourself.

Basically, you need to embrace to good in you, and forget about the stuff you can’t change. See, I can look at myself and say ‘yeah, I have no hips, acne scarring, and a bit of a bulge in my tummy, but I’ve got a nicely curvy bust, great taste in clothing, a good head on my shoulders, and a fantastic smile.

That’s the best way to improve your self esteem- wearing a smile!

Answer #5

Everyone is different no 2 people are the same you are the way you are.

And I hate the word ugly no one should be considered ugly, ugly is a word used by high class stuck up people that only care about there beautiful gorgeous apperances rather then feelings.

Its true those people who are beautiful are very beautiful in appearance but there personality is the thing they should call ugly because there ugly to everyone they treat.

And you see those people who are not considered “Beautiful” have some of the most best and true feelings you will ever encounter because they know how to treat someone they see people as “Equal” not “Indifferent, strange, or “Ugly”.

Looks are not everything you would find out that those popular beautiful girls in highschool running around with those football players wind up being some of the most loneliest drunkin women livin in some trailer in Arizona working nights in a strip bar being divorced. So be fortunate and treat people with respect.

Answer #6

First of all you need to specifically identify what you dont like (I look like a cow doesnt cut it… be specific) Then you need to knock down things that simply dont make sense… like generalizations (e.g. no one likes me, you know that’s not true…) Being fat doesnt make you ugly… you know that… you’ve seen fat women who are pretty (also you’re not fat… fat is like 250 pounds, and you’re no where near that!) Now your boyfriend thinks you are beautiful. It is your problem if you dont agree. Maybe he is biased or whatever, but he still thinks you are beautiful. At the end of the day he is allowed to see you the way he sees you (keep arguing and he may eventually agree with you…) Deep down you know you’re really hard on yourself. Maybe you need to focus on other things apart from your appearance… So what if you’re not the prettiest person on earth? it doesnt make any of your other qualities any less valuable… Accept yourself in other ways, and maybe you’ll start to get over the whole appearance thing…

Answer #7

I agree with Lex icon I always look at the positive about my self.. as for me I love my eyes and everybody comment on them. If I look at one thing I feel good enough for it all

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