How do I deal with this? She is my husbands best friend.

I was supposed to meet my husbands best friend for the first time and she stood me up. She lives out of town and my husband is overseas so my son who is 8 months and I were going to meet up with her. First she tried to get us to go to her friends baby shower. I did not know her or her friend and felt that would be kind of awkward. But most importantly my son has been getting overwhelmed with a lot of strangers so I tried to persuade her to meet me somewhere else that would be more familiar to both of us. Her first reaction was oh he will love me and not notice anyone else. I told her yes I am sure that my son will love you but I don’t think that it is a good idea. She agreed to meet us after the baby shower over at my inlaws (she has known them for years so I thought that would make her comfortable). We waited for her for 3 and a half hours. I called her cell and left messages and sent her texts. She never responded. That was 3weeks ago. I know that she is alive and well because she has checked the email that I sent her and never responded. Today I got a Happy Mothers Day message from her. I am trying not to dislike the girl but I get the impression that she had no intention of going out of her way to meet me. She would only have met me if I came to her. My husband has not said one word to her about this and it hurts my feelings. He said that he does not think that he should just write her off because of this. I don’t think that but I would expect him to be more upset. what should I do? I am afraid that she is not as good of a friend as he thinks that she is. My true friends would never dream of doing that to me or my husband. And I would be pissed!