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How do I approach my mom about this?

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I am 16 years old...my birthday is 3/26/93. I am dating a guy who just turned 21 yesterday, on 2/16 (born in 1989). His name is Brian. We have been together for 10 months about (with no official date)...and we have been sexually active for almost as long. We don't have an official anniversary because of our age difference. I prefer to wait until I am 17 (age of consent in NY) until we start dating officially. In the past few days I've been using the bathroom WAY too much. sometimes I have to pee twice before I even leave the bathroom! I ALWAYS feel like I have to go...however I don't know what caused this. I also dont know how to cure it. I am not comfortable enough asking my mom...but I am extremely comfortable with my um 'partner's' mom that I want to talk to her about it. I want to have a little background knowledge before going into this though. can sex be a cause of my recent problem? I also got my period yesterday...can that play a factor? I talked to brian about it and he said he is pretty sure his mom knows we are sexually active...he said "I hope she thinks I got some by 21." Sweet. trying to make me laugh :) he also told me that when his parents met they were the same age as we are now...give or take a few months...and they even "went steady" on my birthday. how cute! His mom always tells me "it's a sign...you were meant to date my son!" I really love him and I dont want to possibly lose his parents trust by bringing this up with them. what if they don't think were having sex? I dont want to cause problems...maybe I should talk to my own mom about it? I dont have a strong relationship with my mom at all. we RARELY talk about our social or private lives with each other...and on valentines day my mom still acted shocked that brian gave me roses. she even asked if he was a good kisser...um, mom? we've been together for almost a year and you think we just started kissing recently? I don't know sometimes with her...she acts so immature about this stuff. I really dont know how to approach her. Who should I ask?

Also, seeing as I will be 17 soon I wanted to ask my mom if I would be allowed to sleep over brian's house. it would make things so much easier...

brian has a futon in his room and he told me he would let me sleep in his bed and he would use the futon when I sleep over. I have no intention of sleeping with him because I know how many lines would be crossed in doing so. but I think my mom is being a little harsh in having him drive me home every night. Example: last night we celebrated his brithday and went out for dinner. he drank his first legal beer last night at around 7...and then had to drive me home at 12. Last night it also snowed for a little, and then the temperature dropped so severely that all roads had a thin layer of ice on them. Was it really safe for brian who had drank (even if it was 5 hours previous) to drive me home on such icy roads in total darkness? I think in situations like this my mother should really trust me and just let me sleep over. brian had classes this morning at 8, so I would have been home in the morning anyway. plus both of his parents were home and so were his sister and her boyfriend. maybe this is an issue my mom has with brian? I am not too sure...but I have no clue how to approach her about this.

I am a very responsible person. I have a job. I just bought my own car (which I cant drive until my 17th brithday) I pay my own car insurance, I pay my own phone bill, and I buy all of my own clothes, pay for all of the dinners I eat when I go out with my friends, and I pay for all of my friends' birthday presents without help from my mom. Oh and I have a 97 average in all AP classes, and I am in the National Honor Society, the Tri-M Music Honor Society, World Language Honor Society, Mathletes, and Key Club. I also started a charity of my own in my high school collecting soda pull tabs for cancer patients. I speak german as well as english, and I am taking spanish. I don't know what else I need to do to prove to my mother that I am responsible enough to sleepover brian's house...honestly I dont. Any advice as to how to ask her? or drop huge hints?