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How to help my parents through their divorce?

My dad cheated on my mom with some lady he’s known for a long time. My mom found out because I think the lady called her and told her everything. She got a lawyer and is going to divorce him, but she hasn’t told him. He knows that she knows about his affair but I dont think he realizes its over between them, he thinks that its okay and that we all forgive him. So my mom have to divorce my dad secretly and go to private meetings a lot and stuff..

And I have 2 problems, My dad is going to go CRAZY when my om finally comes out about the divorce, how can I help or comfort him. (I’m 13 btw) And 2nd, how can I help my mom?

I love them both and I don’t knw what to do anymore!

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Answer #1

Oh hun. You are in a rough spot. I think you should tell your mom that she needs to talk to your dad. Two wrongs don’t make a right. And her being secret about what is coming is wrong. Then I would try to let the two of them get through it without you in the middle. Let them know you love both of them equally. They love you and I am sure they will do everything to try to keep you out of it. In fact, I’m sure if they knew you were here asking for advice for them, they would both be mortified because you are acting more grown up than either of them has. I am proud of you for being so understanding of both but somethings are just too complicated to get mixed into. GOOD LUCK! I will be praying for you and your parents. ~lauren

Answer #2

Dear cheergirlx3, It is not your responsibility to do anything. I understand you want to help them both but this is between them. You need to stay out of it totally. If either one asks what you know you say nothing. Let them handle it. When they have taken care of their business then it will be time to sit and talk as a family about it. Do you have a trusted adult besides them you can speak with? If so now is the time to call them and talk with them. If not speak with a counsellor at the school they can help a lot. Sue…good luck

Answer #3

The trick is to try to catch him off guard and possible catch him with his hand in the cookie jar again. . . . Don’t worry about him right now support your Mom. I know you love them both but she needs your support right now. . . When he gets what’s coming he will get what he earned. . . . When the time comes comfort him but when he trys got get sympathy let him know His actions put him there. And follows Sue90’s advice.

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