Divorce rate

I think people just jump into relationships too quickly. They have the happiness for the first year, get married, and then realize the person they thought they loved really isnt so romantic/ nice/ watever. I think people just get married too quickly. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years and the last thing I think we are ready for is marraige. We love eachother and hardly ever fight [now] but we’re taking things slow.

I think a lot has to do with the fact that times have changed. Divorce has changed more in this country in the past 5 years than in the last 20. Divorce used to be something people didn’t talk about and didn’t do, and it was served up with a heavy dallop of guilt if you decided to go through with it. The stigma of divorce is being lifted, people are recognizing that not all realationships can be saved and that people can divorce and move on to live wonderfully happy lives they never thought possible because they thought they were supposed to stay unhappy in an unhappy marriage. People grow over time and sometimes they grow apart, it’s a part of life. I work for www.firstwivesworld, it is an online community for women navigating through the various stages of divorce and life thereafter. It is an amazingly positive place and the stories of these women are so inspiring it’s amazing. If you are curious and want to learn more check out the website and hear it from the horses’ mouth so-to-speak Hope that helps Ann Marie

Dear stephanief987, Yes, marriage is again showing greater lasting power. From what I experience out in the field with the older couples this is what they are saying. They got married to get out of dysfunctional homes, they married without knowing their partner well enough, they were too young and it was expected of them to be married. Today we can say it is much more accepted and even recommended to live with your partner for a while before marriage. People are waiting till they are older and more secure and mature. Men expect women to be a 50, 50 partner today being responsible for 1/2 of household bills etc. Men are also expected to be a 50, 50 partner in raising children…these are all new trends for the newly married couples. So in a nut shell we have leaned from the past and we can now counsel the young on this topic with much more knowledge about past failures. You live in a wonderful time really, you can see what doesn’t work and work on what does. Sue…good luck

People think marriage is about love and finding your soulmate, but the concept of romantic love is a relatively new one… Until a couple of decades ago people married for convenience… It was great if you fell in love, but it wasnt really a requirement. Then a few decades ago people had enough wealth that they could afford the luxury of love… The standard of living went up, and people had enough money to date… A few years after that women started gaining equal rights, they were able to support themselves without men (so if they were being beaten or cheated on they could leave), and divorces became relatively simple to obtain… Slowly marriage was no longer about convenience, and it became about finding a partner to not just have kids with but who was also supposed to make you happy… Combine this with a relaxing attitude towards divorce by society and you get a pretty high divorce rate as people expect more and more from their partners without wanting to put in the time and effort to fix what is wrong with the relationship…

People divorce because they’re unhappy. You can’t be happy unless you know yourself. So once you are actually old enough and have experienced enough to truly know yourself and love yourself, you can be fairly sure you don’t truly love another person in the romantic sense. More likely than not it’s being in love with the idea of love or just general lust or infatuation. People tend to date people within the same mental state or level maturation and or mental and emotional sickness. It’s hard for a person to know themselves in this day and age due to the fact that they’re caught up in the material world perpetuated by tv, movies, internet etc… conforming to that cookie cut Ken and Barbie doll image that the media feeds us. It’s a by product of living in a first world nation, if you check the divorce rates of third world nations there is a drastic difference. It seems everyone in these first world nations thinks it’s a God given right to be happy and that the world owes them happiness. When in fact God only gave us the right to the PURSUIT of happiness it even says so in the constitution. “If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it’s another nonconformist who doesn’t conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity.” (Bill Vaughan)”Know thyself” (Socrates, Yoda)

I think that a lot of people act how they think the other person wants them to be, but when they get married, they stop lying about how they really are, and may or may not disappoint the other person. I think if people were more honest about how they really are DURING the relationship, the other person would be more able to tell if they were compatible or not.

Women are suppose to respect men but they dont so they dont get along and argue 2much Both parents work they dont have much time to spend time together

Dear Steph, Believe it or not divorce is at the lowest rate since the mid 1970’s. I think we simply have so many ways to find statistics and when we see these numbers we think nobody stays married anymore etc..But we are at the lowest since the 70’s. Familycoach

My advice,

Is dont bother, it is just a piece if paper, that if the worst happens, just makes it a very nice money spinner for the lawyers and the court system…

My advice, stay clear…

All releationships have a chance of going wrong, just dont make it harder for when it does!!!

The divorce rate is so high because all people care about is sex, and when that isn’t working out they get divorced to have sex with better looking people. In Western Civilization there is no love in marriage, just sex. Love does not exist in these marriages. Hope this helped.

My opinion, faith and true commitment to one another is very lacking - I think it’s true: ‘people are so busy trying to make a living or outdo the Jonses, that they forget about making a Life (the little important things like - having all the family around the table at dinner and being interested in wha kind of day they’ve had - also vowing never to go to bed mad at each other) - just me but I think when we kicked God out of our schools it tended to put us in a downward life spiral - severely lacking in core values…Hope this helps !!

Decades ago there was a stigma and shame associated with divorce. Because of this lots of people stayed in unhappy marriages. Also, since women had poor prospects for supporting themselves they often had little choice but to stay in abusive relationships.

I’ve met married couples who were together for 50 years and had been making each other miserable for almost 50 years.

People do change over time. My ex and I were pretty compatible when we got together but over time we grew apart. We stuck it out 17 years but to tell the truth we should have split up much earlier. I kept hoping that things would get better but they never did.

if your starting to be rude then I dont care

just stop annoying me!!

Techno Star

people are getting married too soon and without knowing their Partners well enough.

I think people sometimes jump into marriages too soon to really know what they want.

people are getting married too soon and without knowing their Partners well enough.