How to deal with bullies?

Dear brighteyez, This is a really tough thing to go through and with luck these bullies won’t bother you but be prepared for if they do…have a plan is the #1 thing. You see their style and their method if you were their target what would you do…think this through very well so you are not taken by surprise if they target you. Words hurt and are hard to ignore but if they are using words you really need to pretend not to hear them. If they put hands on you must have the teacher and the police involved. Talk with your teacher NOW and make him/her aware of what you are feeling (be pro-active) in your own life. Gather all the classmates who have been bullied and have a meeting together with your teacher. The teacher should be able to tell you how to take notes and document the bullies behaviours so this proof can be used to have the bullies removed from the class and perhaps the school. Sue….good luck

Well, I agree ‘in part’ with the first solution. I to was a bullied person in school, up until I turned the age of 17. I guess you could say ‘I finally came into my own’. A few years prior to turning 17 (and I wasn’t ‘big’ into sports, certainly no ‘jock’) I played a little baseball & football for my school. Then went into a bit of weightlifting, then onto the wrestling team. I bulked-up a ‘little’, I gained a certain amount of confidence, and of course put on a bit more muscle. My ‘attitude’ began to change about myself (for the better). I was of course ‘stronger’, I was of course ‘faster’ in most every respect, and from somewhere I gained far more ‘mental courage’. You would have thought maybe, that all of those physical improvements would have caused the bullies to take notice, and think twice from then on. Well….it did achieve ‘one’ of those things. The bullies indeed did take notice. The notice they took was, ‘that I was a far more worthy ‘challenge’ for them, which in fact increased the bullying a bit. However, I was then much more up to meeting their challenges, and did. And rather successfully I might add. And then, the bullying ‘finally stopped’ after a short period (by the time I reached 17). But yes, sadly, that short period ended up being chock full of ‘physical confrontation’.

I preached being able to physically take care of yourself to my children. I now preach being able to take care of yourself to my grandchildren. However, with a slight twist. That ‘twist’ is, the ‘law’! Handle what needs handling through ‘legal recourse’ first and as best you can. Through ‘School Authority’. Through the ‘parents of the bullies’. And then (and only then), if necessary, if left no other alternative, you resort other methods, if there is just no other way.

It is either that or (as has been suggested) you do your best to ‘ignore’, to ‘take it’, to ‘try’ and simply ‘walk away’, to ‘avoid’, to close your mind and ears to it, to ‘turn off and tune out’ your heart and feelings. And hope and pray that your selfesteem doesn’t go into the toilet, to remain forever. Praying that once you are in the ‘real world’, the ‘adult world’, that you have finally made it beyond all that you suffered the embarrassement and humiliation of, and that it is once-and-for-all, over.

There are plenty of ‘options’ in dealing with life (i.e. bullies). The tough part is, choosing those options, sticking with them, and feeling yourself a better ‘inner person’ for it. I sure don’t envy you your predicament! I’ve been there to!

I was always picked on in school. What worked for me was to ignore them. Walk away acting like I did not hear their rude remarks, jokes, and nasty name calling. It eventually got boring for them and they quit. I was told later they stopped picking on me because they thought I didn’t care. I realized then just how stupid they were.

Try not to let others bother you. Most reasons people pick on other people is because they are jealous of them or they don’t feel good about themselves. If they knock you and others down, then they feel better about their own selves. Once you realize why people do what they do, then you automatically feel better. Them picking on you could be a sign that they are just jealous of you. My one school teacher always used to say ‘consider the source and let it go’.

Of course this doesn’t work for physically violent people. They need higher authority to put them in their place. Fighting on their level only gets you like them and you just have to keep fighting to prove yourself to them and any other joker who is friends with them. Best to let those in authority take care of them!

Stand up to them. most Bullies are insecure too…and if confronted outside of the group will back off…

Thanxx so much, you all helped a lot!!!!!