Funadvice Logo
Explore Join
More Parents & Family Questions

Why is my mom acting so rude?

I’m 16 and all my life all I ever tried to do is try to make my mom proud of me. I have straight a’s in school and I never talk back because I wouldn’t want to be treated that way. But lately I’ve made a few mistakes and I did lie to her, and I regret it. Now, no matter what she won’t speak to me and she punished me for something I already did and cant take back. Her idea of punishment is an extremely early curfew, making me do things around the house that I had never had to do before.. When she does speak to me, she is rude and nothing is helping this situation. She doesn’t trust me at all anymore and I want to regain her trust in me but I don’t know how. All I want is our old relationship back but I don’t know how to get it.

Become an Expert →
Answer #1

There are probably a couple of reasons…

*One, you’re 16. This means you’re probably moving out of the house soon…and with what it sounds like, you’ll be going to college, too! Congrats! :) But with college comes a whole bunch of new opportunities and life lessons: some will be wonderful, others stupid; some as good life lessons, others entirely non-beneficial. But for even the best college student who never partied, made straight-A’s and Valedictorian of their class, she had a mother who had to let her baby go grow up. She may be feeling early “empty nest syndrome” since you’ve started flexing muscles a bit and testing the limits of her rules.

Another possibility could be that since she knows you’re getting older (and I have to say it…in the middle of natural hormonal fluctuations and changes that can drive your mom batsht even if you don’t notice you’re talking or behaving any differently than normal), she is behaving more as the world does: with a firmer hand towards the older and learned versus the soft, forgiving hand mostly reserved for the ignorant and youth. Part of her wants to teach you with “tough love”, and where you’re at in life and in your relationship with her may simply further spur on that toughness.

Whatever it is, don’t give up, and whatever you do…do not mistake a calloused way of treating you to be actions devoid of love; that is NOT true, and NOTHING is worth damaging the bond with she who bore you life…it is so very hard to fix. I think if you approach her genuinely about the subject in a one-on-one way when no one is anxious, pressed on a deadline or obligation or fresh from a fight, you may find she could be a lot more willing to smooth out the creases with you than you thought. :)

Answer #2

my moms the samee way dont feel badd…have you explained to her why you did what you did? did you tell her the way you feel? thats the onlee way things will get better!!!

Answer #3

First, I would like to say that I know how your mom feels. I have a 16 y/o daughter that has recently lost my trust in her. I also have not spoken to her on occasions due to her attitude, not because of what he did. However, mom will come around. She cant be angry you all the time. Give her time, space for a lil while. Then, ask her if you two can talk. You start off by saying, your sorry for whatever it is that you did. I am only giving you advice on how I would want to be treated. Especially as a mom.

Always follow your “gut” instinct. I have told my daughter the same. If you feel like what you are doing will have consequences…then think twice.

Answer #4

Time to talk…Preface it with “When you have time, I’d like for us to talk”. She’s still pissed, and from reading your ‘history’, I’d say that your ‘mistakes’ really caught her off guard, and she really doesn’t know how to react.

You say what you said here…that it’s really important to you that she be proud of you, that you are REALLY sorry to pulled a couple of sh*tties on her, and that you regret it a lot. That you’re fine with doing the extra things around the house, but the unforgiving attitude is really hurting you.

p

Answer #5

once you lose somebodys trust it takes a long time to gain it back. you probably hurt your mom and let her down by lying to her. but everyone makes mistakes, nobodys perfect…it sounds like shes being a little harsh and immature by being rude when she speaks to you. but it could be way worse trust me!! what if your mom or dad would just stop talking to you like for good?? lol

Answer #6

it will take some time for her to feel like she cantrust you again. just give her some space. and just try doing little things around the house to let her know that you are trying. good luck.

More Like This
Advisor

Parents & Family

Parenting, Marriage, Childcare

Ask an advisor one-on-one!
Advisor

Being Mom and More

Parenting, Pregnancy, Books

Advisor

Mommy is a Hero

Parenting, Family, Lifestyle

Advisor

Proud Mummy

Parenting, Community, Moms

Advisor

MakeAmom

Family Planning, Health & Wellness, Parenting