How do I have sex with my boyfriend when it feels like I'm with my father?

oh my gosh hunny thats really bad to hear! and I feel the same way.. I no what it feels like.. beleive me it will pass hun just dont think about it think of positive things hun. stay strong x

sorry to hear that but I suguest thearpy,talking with your boyfriend,ell even talk to your dad and ask him why he did that to you and how it’s affecting your life.

i know its hard not to forget that you were abused bye ur dad but you need to fight it and talk to your boy friend tell i wont break up with u i just need to know the truth and after he tells u the truth u caan break up with him or whatever u want to do with that situation Good Luck!!!

This is a serious issue - one I dont think anyone can help you with except maybe a councellor. Perhaps you and your partner can go see one together. I really dont think he knows what you are feeling unless he has experienced sexual abuse himself. Maybe the councelling will help you both through his situation.

ok,this is a very difficult situation……have u had enjoyable sex b4? if so then dont think about ur dad during sex w/ ur bf.just dont. its gonna b hard cuz ur gonna remember all the things he did to u……and thats just not cool.but remember wen u had sex w/ him and it was so great….dont u want that feeling again? u know ur dad isnt ur bf and u know ur bf isnt ur dad. u need to just do it any ways…..just dont think about anything else….get caught up in how it feel not wat it reminds u of……… if u want ur bf to b happy, like nike says, just do it. if those thoughts about ur dad do happen to pop up then think of how much u love ur bf and how much u really do wanna have sex w/ him….how u really do want it to b enjoyable 4 both of u. i hope this helps….. later! blondie

I know how you fell. When I was six my babysiters boys would rape my every night. I didn’t know it was wrong. they would wake my up and just start raping me. I didn’t know what to do. Then the first time I had sex I was at my boyfriends house and when he was on me I pushed him off and he said I had this scared look on my face. We sat together for a while and I told him the story. He was mad about it but he wouldn’t make a move until I was ready. He told me that his ex was sexually raped by her dad. He even did it to her brother. She would be screaming for him to stop, and now she cant have kids because he messed her up. so we both now how you fill. I try not to dwell on the past, but I’ve gotten over the fear. But I do think he is cheating on you. Its time to let him go.

                                                  Sorry Sweety

The way your father violated and abused you has made you feel in your subconsience that sex is violent and intrusive. Try having sex every now and then but let your boyfriend know you need to be in control. Get comfortable and take the lead, don't be agressive cause that can sometimes lead to the feeling of giving in. Right now, it's about your pleasure and your boyfriend needs to know that (not in those words exactly). Kind of like dancing, one person leads and the other person shouldn't try anything fancy, (or anything at all at first). It's not going to feel right at first but it will feel right again. Your dreams will let you know when.

c im having the same problem xcept my dad beat me and molested me when I was 9 and I didnt tell till I was 12 and I cant even live right its hard 4 me 2 trust any man and I cant keep a relationship 4 longer than 2 months I don’t know what 2 do its just killing me but no matter how good I do it always just gos 2 shit and I’ve NEVER had counceling 4 any thing I just hold it all in and its tearing me apart I cant even function in life!