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Can you grow to love somebody?

okay, i was dating a guy that i truly love so much. We broke up but i was still in love with him and tried to get him back, but he only wanted to have— so i stop and moved on. After a year or so i met a guy and we were engaged to be married. I would see my ex at work from time to time and i knew i still love him. He said he got engage because he was leaving for iraq. As months went by, i realize i didnt love this guy i was going to marry so we departed .I knew i was still in love with my ex, but he eventually got married right away and left for iraq. I later found out that his new wife look just like me. We finally had a chance to be together after 2 years only because i never act like i wanted him, i only would talk to him at work and we both would move on. Finally it happen, i had him come over for a drink and we talked and we had mad —. Then a week later i called him again and we did it again. I love this man so much i dont know what to do. I did decide not to call him again for about a month or two just to see if he will call me, I know he will, but i also know he is married. He keep telling me he only got married because he was leaving for iraq. I told him that i didnt marry because i wasnt in love, He said, you can grow to love somebody. I just want to know if he did marry her because of stability or if he had to grow to love her? I still love this man deeply, What should i so?

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Answer #1

That is one LAME excuse for getting married! Doesnt marriage involve LOVE, and FIDELITY? None of which he seems to know anything about. You are being used for sex hun, and nothing more. He proved that after you broke up. Now he’s still using you, and you are allowing him to. He doesnt love you. Sex doesnt prove love. If he loved you, he wouldnt be screwing around on his wife. You are only a side dish, and will continue to be until YOU put a stop to it!

Fnd a new partner, why make the same old mistake over again? Relationships break down for a reason. If you couldn’t get along with the him before, what makes you think having sex with him is going to change things? It didn’t before…

  • Don’t fool yourself! Even if your ex is having sex with you, it does not necessarily mean they care about you, or want to get back together * Most people are vulnerable after a break up. It can be easier to be hurt by someone who has moved on emotionally but stays with you sexually.

The end of an intimate relationship is a devastating love regardless of the conditions leading up to it. How we grieve that loss will determine the rest of our lives. No matter what reason a relationship ends, we must take special care of the grieving process.. gOod eNdinGs mAkeS gOod bEgiNniNgs.

Answer #2

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?! LEAVE HIM ALONE!!! you’re only hurting yourself AND his wife! get CLOSURE and MOVE THE F*CK ON! he’s using you for sex and he doesn’t love you or else he would not be MARRIED to someone else, would he?

Answer #3

this is a very complex situation on YOUR hands here. If you were still in love with your ex you should have never agreed to marry your ex fiance’. Your ex is also in the wrong because he knows he is married, and your in the wrong for letting that happen, all you need to do is gain closure, if it’s about talking things out with him, or even getting back with him[ last resort] gain closure.

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