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What can I say to my parents who saw a lovebite on my neck?
I have strict Asian parents (only when it comes to me and boys they are fine with me going out and stuff) I came back from university with a bit of a love bite that I covered up. The afternoon after I arrived my dad saw it and was like “what is that?” Obviously there was no way he was going to get the truth so I said it was a rash. He totally didn’t believe me and was like “a rash yeah”. I tried talking to him normally about something else about 10 minutes later but he just yelled at me that he can’t help me and that I shouldn’t insult his intelligence and that he isn’t dumb! He must have told my mum as she asked me a little bit later and I said the same thing, that its a rash! she said it looks like a love bite…I think she kinda believes me though, or at least she wants too!! I kept saying why would I be dumb enough to get a love bite and then come home?! (Damn my boyfriend for giving me one!!) so I think she can see the logic behind that…and its not an AWFUL love bite it could actually be a rash! My issue is that my Dad hasn’t spoken to me since he yelled at me and its been a day and he completely ignored me the whole of yesterday, and I heard him asking my mum if she had spoken to me about it and that I cant fool him! Luckily my brother’s found this whole thing ridiculous and funny and keeps making jokes about it around my mum so I’m trying to act as normal as possible!! She asked me again last night if it definitely isn’t a love bite and I was like no it isn’t!!! Then she gave me a bit of a lecture on how she hears things about other peoples children and she hopes people aren’t things about me..I literally was like =| And I just don’t know what to do about my dad…I know a lot of people are thinking that at my age I should be able to do what I want, specially as I live away for university, but in our culture its just not like that! I can’t leave as I can not afford to pay for university myself, so please no-one suggest that I run away! I don’t know WHAT to do and he is sooo mad at me!! =(
Dear Staryeyed, I think you should talk to your father and tell him the truth and tell him you have the responsibility to have a boyfriend and that you are mature enough to date. It’s quite difficult for me to give you advice as your culture is different as I don’t have a religion at the moment but I give you my best and good luck!
Dustyforever xxx
Hey mom I have a boyfirend…
I mean your old enuff yo date and all so your old enuff to take the responsibility and day I have a boyfriend and he did this to me.
my dads not really the kind of person you can talk to when hes angry.. and trust me, as soon as I tell him the truth he will hit the roof. literally!
Well you could try to have a sit down talk with your dad, he has to except that your growing up. The longer you tell him it’s a rash the angrier he’ll be.
yeah I know it was my own fault! but im at university its not like im a 13year old child..and its not like I did something hideous, its a pretty normal thing! it was mostly faded when he saw it! its nearly completely gone now…but yeah its besides the point. I have calmed down…but yeah you are right I have to be natural! yeah I will have words with my brother… thanks =)
I know but I cant tell my parents that I have a boyfriend, that wont fly at all! lol
Look, it was entirely your mistake. You knew that your parents are strict about these kinds of things but you still did them. It would have helped had you waited until the “lovebite” faded or you could have covered it up better, but really, that’s all beside the point right now. The point is that no one will be mad forever and the best thing you can do is calm down and be natural, not act natural. Trust me, the latter is a guise that is always very easy to see through. It would also help if both you and your brother did not mention this ever again- as your father does not believe your “rash” story, it simply angers him every time he hears it.
You learned a lesson here and next time you will remember to be more careful.
thanks a lot :) its all been sorted out now! x
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