That ache in my heart cant go away...

Its been awhile since me and my ex broke up…but I can’t seem to get over her…we dated when we were freshmens and now I stand as a grown man…while we were dating I mistreated her, I cheated on her 2 times. the girls I’ve dated after her didnt ever give me the feelings and affections she gave me. I just couldnt even talk to her after we broke up…I knew I did her wrong, but I wanted to hide from the shame and I just avoided all the text msgs, phone calls, myspace msgs, aims, everything from her…I even blocked her from everything…all of her friends told me she was hurt badly…but she managed to date a few guys after me and shes with this one guy named winson right now. On our high schoo graduation day, I couldn’t help but stare at her…shes going far away for college and I might never see her again…but before she left, she promised everyone she would stay for the new years party reunion, which was this year, jan1,2009. When I got to the party with my girlfriend Lisa, I just started looking everywhere for mandy(my ex) …I couldnt find her… I lost hope and interest in the party…so I sat down. then, I saw a little image of her on the dance floor. as I approched her, I saw her dancing with winson to a love song…I was heartbroken…I waited for her to go get a drink…and I went to her. In 4 years… I finally talked to her…she sure was shocked…when she asked me how was everything with lisa she stared into my eyes…I couldn’t help it, but told her all my feelings RIGHT THERE…tears came down her cheeks and I remembered every word she said to me…” in four years…you never talked to me…did you know how much fukcing pain I went through…all the painful nights I cried myself to sleep, all the times I had to see you with a new girl and I couldnt say anything about it…I couldnt get over you…all the guys I went out with…never gave me the same feelings you gave me…I just couldnt get over you the past 4 years…but…right now… ( the fireworks started to come out because it was new years ) on Jan 1, 2009 … I got over you… “ she ran off on me full with tears… I couldnt help but broke down and cried…I felt stupid…this regretion I could never get out of me…I dont even know what to do anymore…shes getting married…with winson in 2 months…what should I do?!…