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How can we cope with our families not wanting us together?

My boyfriend and I have been together for close to a year and a half. Our relationship began just as both of our marriages had fallen apart. Our mothers are totally against us being together. His mom because she think I broke up his marriage. My mom because she thinks he is a player. We both have been in some really bad relationships, and know that we are perfect for one another. Never did we imagine a connection this strong could ever exist. We know we are soul mates. How do we get our moms past this. I am willing to walk away from my mom and be happy, but family is super important to him and he can’t handle family tension. This family issue is huge for him and it scares him to death to have such obstacles in our way. Please help me come up with a way to show our moms that we need their support and that we are both very serious.

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Answer #1

Man sounds like something I faced. My husbands family hated me for 10 years and boy they didn’t mind telling me that. First I stopped talking about the issues with them to him. I let him see it for himself once he did he put his foot down. You can not let your family control your life or relationship it will never last if you do. I would sit both mothers down and tell them that while they may not agree with this that it is not up to them to decide. And that you love them and you understand that they are concerned and have heard thier concerns. But if they can not accept it then they will not be able to be an active part of your life. Also let them know that if they have issues with you and your boyfriend’s choice of a mate then they need to express it let it me heard one time only then listen to what you have to say and then move on. If they can’t keep thier mouths closed you have to close the door. His mom will probably hate everyone he dates if it was his first marriage and she liked her. He needs to make it clear that the marriaged ended by other means than you. And that she dosen’t have to accept you but she has to respect his choice as a man and that she has to respct you. GOODLUCK

Answer #2

Kass has some good advice, follow that first.

If that fails, ask yourself if you can be happy with both moms on your case forever or not seeing them.

You are both jumping into a hornet's nest: good luck.

Answer #3

Try to do something nice for his mom. In my experience, if the moms (especially both moms) are not for the union, as tempting as it is now, it will fall apart later, especially if both are close to your mothers.

Both of you have to work really hard to getting to like each other's moms.

But then again… I change my mind… fuck it. If you guys will be happy then go for it! Life is too short, they will come around later when you give them grandchildren!

Answer #4

the best thing i can come up with is to get together with both of your families (or just your mothers), and have a serious talk. be sure to get out everything you are feeling and allow them to also. if they see you together, and you give them a chance, they'll most likely be more willing to listen to you. try not to get angry becasue the truth is parents sometimes come off as jerks but they do it only because they love you and want what's best for you (they think they know what that is -even when it's not what you want) i hope this has helped. God Bless!

Answer #5

KILL YOUR PARENTS!!!

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