Parent and your spouse want different things who do you obey?

Im not married. I just want to know the answer. If your parent and your spouse want different things who do you obey? The bible says both so how do you go about doing that? This is a religious question for christians.

Answer #1

if you’re not married - a minor - your parents have the say, not your boyfriend - over 18, not married you must discern what is best for you, being an adult - in a marriage, the Husband, as head of household - if I come anywhere close to understanding your question - hope I helped.

Answer #2

toadaly, God looks at us a precious… his church, his body…

Christians see their Lord… as precious…

We obey his commands, out of love for him.

He would never cosider us as property.

Man would. but, not God.

Nor would Jesus.

Jesus watches over us tenderly, and carefully, and what he is saying is that marriage works best, with one head.

That does not mean that the woman has no say, if the husband loves her, like Jesus loves the church, he will want her to be happy, content, and satisfied.

If she loves him, as she loves Jesus, she will want to do as he desires. This is meant to be a beautiful thing, between a man and a woman, not a matter of contention, or a game of power, or control.

That should have nothing to do with it. Jesus never… controls any of us.

Never. ever.

not happening…

nor does he desire that we should control another, whether it be our friend our our spouse. We are to be free, under him.

Free people that love their maker, will walk in love.

They have no desire to control.

That is flesh.

We are to be led by the Spirit of the Living God.

If we are, we will not resort to flesh.

Answer #3

Biblically, once you are married you become the property of your husband rather than the property of your father, so your husband is your master rather than your father, dear female chattel.

…or you could realize the Bible is nonsense and make your own decisions.

Answer #4

Do what resonates to you, what you feel right not anyone else but yourself, do what you feel is in your heart, no one can control another human being, we are all here experiencing life, you are the captain of your own ship!!

Answer #5

Amoeba, there is only one church that I know of that people refer to as “the church” and that has an official leader of the religion and that is the Catholic church. Sorry I did not specify.

Answer #6

That is not what is taught by the church ty. I guess it would depend on your church though. It was written in a time when women didn’t have say in anything and were the responsibility of the husband.

Answer #7

The bible says that once your married your body does not belong only to you but also to your husband - it also says likewise, husbands you do not belong only to yourself, but to your wife also. Marriage is a partnership, parenthood a dictatorship. That’s just how it is. The bible also says that the husband is the spiritual head of the household, and that he will rule over you. Don’t take this to mean that he can tell you that you can not see your friends or that he can hurt you, but it does mean that your husband should be a huge part of the decision making process.

Answer #8

gasmanobt3: “As far as men being the head of the house: It may sound archaic but it did work for thousands of years so there must be some merit to it.”

Yeah, so did slavery… I guess we should have stuck with that too?

runblade: “The bible says to Honor them. It doesn’t say to obey them”

I simply pointed out the BIBLE does say that… I claim to have no knowledge of your church or it’s teachings…

Answer #9

You are supposed to be committed to your spouse. Parents/ In-laws have a tendancy to live their lives over through the marriages of their children. Inside your home, between spouses, there must be unity. That means you put the needs of your spouse ahead of your own, self sacrificially, out of love for that person. Do we do it? Not as often as we should. Don’t get caught up in trying to please mom or dad as it will bring disharmony between you and your spouse. Also, it doesn’t mean that one spouse dominates the other. As far as men being the head of the house: It may sound archaic but it did work for thousands of years so there must be some merit to it.

Answer #10

I believe that a Christian obeys God. If parent, spouse, school, employer, government or any other influence encourages us to disobey God (by hating people, by ignoring the poor or whatever) then it is our duty to obey God rather than any person. But a married person respects their parents while putting their spouse first. We have left our family home and ‘become one’ with that other person - so long as their interests are in line with God’s will, we put them before our parents. Not INSTEAD of our parents, just first.

Answer #11

Actually… Ephesians 5:22 “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” Ephesians 5:24 “Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” 1 Peter 3:1 “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands…” 1 Corinthians 11:3 “…the head of the woman/wife is the man”

Answer #12

Ok, I hope I don’t sound rude, but NO. You do not do what your husband says, you do what feels right to YOU. NO one else.

Researching religions and finding one which fits into your personal beliefs and feels most comforting is the best option.

You may have to put up with overbearing parents for a while– but once you’re 18 you have the freedom to make up your mind for yourself.

Take it from someone whose mom had to follow everything my grandma said for most of her life. Once she became independent she did what she felt was right and found a husband who shares her beliefs. Either that or a husband who supports her beliefs.

Answer #13

Thanks, as a jew, I had NO idea what that meant and had never heard it before.

Answer #14

The bible says to Honor them. It doesn’t say to obey them. Even priests make take time to point this out every now and again.

Answer #15

once you marry you do what your husban says

Answer #16

Once you’re married I believe you do what your husband says

Answer #17

do what you want to do more.. ?

Answer #18

“That is not what is taught by the church”

the church??? which one is that??? MANY churches still believe and promote the idea of the man as the head of the household and thus to be obeyed…

in answer to the original question… when you are under your parents roof, you respect/obey your parents rules… when you are married, you respect your spouse… notice I said RESPECT your spouse, NOT OBEY…

You obey laws… you respect your spouse…that goes for BOTH genders… Obey doesn’t enter into it…

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