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my 1st poem ever posted

well emodancer aka randi told me to post it because she likes it so what do you guys think

my vision blurred couldn’t seem to listen to anyone lost the ablitly to breathe tasted nothing but dark, bitter medicine collapsed onto the cold, barren ground stopped the beating of my aching heart

you wouln’t care you wouldn’t turn around and hug me and kiss me and hold me in your arems until the end of time

which was why I decided to move on move on to a better place even though I didn’t want to but I knew it had to be done

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Answer #1

I think its amazing I wrote poem 3 days ago it was my first time to write and im telling you its good gr8 way to express what is inside u

Answer #2

very good 2 thumbs up!

Answer #3

I think its so good

I like this part: you wouldn’t care you wouldn’t turn around and hug me and kiss me and hold me in your arms until the end of time

thats really like.. touching I like it a lot

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