is this good for a part of an intro for an essay?

I hjave to start from general to specific, like general, to the topic of the book, this is about change, is it good or bad :/??? PLEASE BE HONEST/… People change all the time in the real world. People change from sweet innocent children, to mean judging people. People change from children who hate eating peas, to grown mothers and fathers that make their children eat them. The point is, everyone goes through changes.

Answer #1

yeah its pretty good.

Answer #2

Well on the first read it sounded okay. I mean its not bad. kinda clever even about the parents and kids. lol. second time I read it I noticed you say the same thing at the start and end. which you don’t really have to say your point twice because your using examples. kinda makes it sound repetitive and not as solid.

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