Is my Mother acting inappropriate?

okay so i think my mom butts too much into my life and if you know what hispanic mother are like u know about this. okay last week i went out shopping with her my sister and my husband(he was just there to pay and carry bags) well my mom decides to go into victoria secret i go with her and my hubby and my sister stay outside eating churros, so im lookin for nice underwear and nexthing i know my mom puts a pair a of huchy panties and on my face and says “ do u like” i said “No” well thats not good enogh for her she has to go and embarrasme by calling my husbands attention and shouting “ alexito do u like these!” and whats worse she was so loud half the mall heard her and she was waving the panties up in the air! omg i wanted to die, sooo embarrasin!!! i still havent talked to her about it but i need to tell her cause shes buttin into my “personal life” too much , i mean she called me after my hunnymoon to ask if the sex was good.what the hell??? do you agree with me?

Answer #1

I think she just wants to be a part of ur life becuase u r starting a new family with ur husband and she wants to be sure that u still love her and care about her just as much! I would just sit her down and say, “mom, i really love u and care about u, but sometimes i feel that u get involved in things you shouldn’t right now. I know it is hard for you, it is hard for me too because you are my mom and i love you. But i have a husband know who loves me and takes care of me, and there are some things that are for husbands and not moms, or moms and not husbands. It is important that you know that i don’t want you out of my life, but i am starting a new life and my husband is part of it. you need to respect us and our privacy.” then u shud maybe suggest going to out to lunch or something to let her know that u still want to be with her. She is like anybody should/would be, u just need to let her know you are growing up and learning how to take care of yourself. pleeez let me know how this goes!!! ~Broadwaystar101

Answer #2

Here are some links that may help to understand this issue better,

Healthy Boundaries

http://www.coping.org/innerhealing/boundary.htm
http://www.healthyboundaries.com/
http://drbalternatives.com/articles/si7.html
http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/Relationships/serendipity/topics/topic004.htm
Answer #3

Yes, I think it was inapproaite… Apparently , she thought it was ok, but, you need to express your feelings to her, concerning this, and let her know, that you resent it, and would like to know that it was not going to happen again. It is a boundary issue, and perhaps her boundaries were breached when she was young, someone may have pushed themselves too far, into her private territory, causing her to not understand others boundaries, if this is true, you will have to firmly help her to understand that you are not at all comfortable with this behavior.

Answer #4

idk if it was inappropriate or if she was just trying to be”DOWN”. you never know is your moms lonely? does she get out much? does she have a group of girlfriends that she can chat with over tea or a beer??? you never know but in a case like this i wouldnt hold a grudge just let her know that you didnt really appreciate he actions and it embarrassed you and please dont do it again!!! but also look into her social life. if one exists.

Answer #5

Growing up is very difficult—for both you and your parents. They remember a little bundle of joy that they held and nurtured as a baby and now they see a budding adult. These days, children face things and know about things that their parents would never have imagined at the same age. The teenagers of today look older, act older and want to be older than their counterparts did just 20 years ago. It is the desire of all parents for their children grow up in the way that they should go (loving, caring, respectful, and being of good solid character). It is necessary that you truly understand that your parents have your best interests at heart. They will withhold privileges, set limits, and raise you to the best of their ability (neither they nor you are perfect), but be Thankful - They Care - many, many, many don’t. Ask them for guidance and seek to understand what truly motivates their decisions. One of the best ways to prove your maturity and prove that you are ready for more trust is to be respectful of your parent’s wishes and accept their guidance. Learn how to communicate love, honor, and respect to each other.

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