Im bullimic and I cant stop! PLEASE HELP.

so I have been bullimic since I dunno about october 23, 2007 and now it is december 10, 2007. my mom knows and shes getting me all the help I can get. I have therapy, I have to go to the doctor every three weeks to get a check up for the next couple months and I have to face my parents lectures everyday. my brother wont even look me in the eye anymore. since I was caught about two weeks ago, I still havnt been able to stop. and when my mom asks me when the last time I threw up was, I tell her the truth because she deserves it. I feel bad because im putting my parents through a really really hard time and im starting to see a difference in my health too. I tell myself everyday to stop but I just cant. my parents know that I always use the bathroom to throw up so they dont let me go in there after I eat anymore, but now, its gotten to the point where I throw up down the drain in the shower. I’ve even thought about having some sort of container in my room and throwing up in there. and then emptying it when my parents arent home. overall,. I really just need help on ways to stop. im not only hurting myself, im hurting the people that really love and care about me

PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE help me stop I cant take my mom crying anymore and I want my brother to respect me again

I DONT WANT TO GO TO THERAPY and I dont want to hurt my body anymore I need advice. please!