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I think I have OCD?
So I think I might have OCD..I have had LOADS of symptoms and at first I didnt really think of it as that bad however it is gradually getting worse and worse and im fed up of feelings like people in my family or people I care about are going to die..so I keep doing these rituals..I have loads of them and I also avoid certain numbers..however, im not too bad with the whole germ thing..I mean yeh I re-clean things before I eat are drink and dont use public toilets etc but im not too bad with that.. its just all the rituals and thoughts that are so hard to control..im not even going to bother you with each little ritual/compultion I have because it will take to long..
But I read that if it doesnt MAJORLY effect your life then you dont have OCD or something.. and so im scared to speak to anyone about it because they will think im being stupid or joking about it because it isnt clearly visible for them..like most of the rituals and stuff are in my head so they wouldnt see it..but it still is effecting my life..I cant cope with these feelings of people dying, its just not right..and it does take up most of my day with these thoughts..
Im scared to tell my guidance teacher even though I tell her like everything becuase im scared she might think im being weird..because its not clear to her..and im scared to tell my mum..
I emailed my counceller and she has said that she will try get hold of the psychiatrist again..but im so worried that she will be like no you dont have it and then I will be thinking that im having these thoughts and there is nothing anyone can help me do to stop them..
Relax, psychiatrists are trained to deal with stuff that is in the mind… Think about most of the disorders they deal with… depression, anxiety disorders (phobias, OCD, etc), most of the symptoms are in the mind… that doesnt make it less real… if you think that people are going to die and so you have to perform rituals, im guessing that is really distressing you… which means it is majorly effecting your life… it probably also takes up a lot of time… that is again, majorly effecting your life… oh and according to the DSM, a disorder is • In the DSM, a disorder is a psychological or behavioral syndrome that produces distress, impairment, or an increased risk of significant negative outcomes… so if it is producing distress it is a disorder…
no one is going to think you’re weird, or not believe you… especially anyone who has been trained to deal with the exact sort of problems you are going through… and listen, stop looking up what you should look like online… that’s the problem with trying to diagnose yourself online… when you study this stuff, you realize that no two people who are diagnosed with the same disorder look the same… sometimes what people have doesnt even look ANYTHING like the disorder you read about (believe me, this has come as a huge shock to me as I’m trying to make sense of it all). So, just tell her what you are thinking and feeling, and s/he’ll talk with you about how to best work it out…
its good that you have emailed your counsiller thats 1 step forward.. they wont judge you they are there to help.. they shouldnt tell you you havent got it…thats them not doing their job properly… they should let you vent all your feelings etc… and listen to what you say.. and help you.. they should give you ways of helping you improve your situation… don’t be afraid to speak to your guidence teacher… she should listen to you also!! shes a teacher and a grown up she wont judge you, well at least she shouldnt!!
I can understand you dont wanna tell your mum I think thats sometihng we all have that problem with!! but DO speak to your guidence teacher she should help you good luck with speaking to the phychiatrist =) hope all goes well and hope this helps a little
xx
You took a good step my emailing someone and telling them what is going on and asking for help. Doctors, Phyciatirst, and Counselers are there to help you, not judge you. You could have a less severe case of OCD or there could be some other psychological reason for the way your feeling - you will never know if you dont ask for help though.
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