how to make no mean no

My one year old son thinks no means do it faster. When I tell him no when hes knocked over the baby gate to get up dstairs he just crawls faster. tonight hes pulled the plug on the t.v. a dozen times. I tell him no when he starts,get up say no, he pulls the plug,I tap his hand, pick him up and put him in time out on the stairs for one minute. He still is keeps pulling the cord out. I’m at a lose and don’t know what else to do keep in mind hes one so taking away a t.v. show makes no sense he doesn’t watch t.v. or that sort of thing. please help

Answer #1

When he does those things he is getting attention from you, so he keeps doing it.

Give him attention some other way- when he pulls the plug on the TV leave it out and walk out of the room…and start to read one of his books. I bet he crawls up on your lap to listen.

Get a gate he can’t bust through, and while you are in the same room continually distract him. Ask him to “help” with your chores, and praise him for being such a smart boy. He’ll keep “helping” and wanting positive attention from you.

You will find he needs almost constant attention and distraction, but that is the way kids are built. It’s not like TV where they amuse themselves- if only that was true. The trick is to give them attention for doing good things, and not bad, so as they grow up you can build on, and praise, all the GOOD. Much more pleasant life for both of you than constantly punishing for doing bad. (Yeah, both still happen, but keep trying to emphasize good :)

Answer #2

No means no when it’s applied consistently. NEVER let your children pass the boundaries you set without conseqence. In my house, my one year old isn’t allowed to touch the plants, TV, bookshelvs and a few other places (I bought covers for the electrical sockets so she’s lost interest those). We specifically avoided “baby proofing” our home because children need to learn the word no. It takes a LOT of work and diligence and it would be easier if we made it so that I could do the dishes and not worry about what she’s getting into. But children learn the meaning of no (and other things) through repetition. Be consistent and you’ll see the payoff. When we go to grandmas house and I say, “Kara - look at me. Do not touch the plants,” she minds. I feel very proud of her, but the hard work (the day to day consistency) happens at home first. BTW: Grandma is always shocked that Kara listens at such a young age. Then again, I’ve seen her techniques of getting children to mind and it involves distracting them, providing them with a more interesting toy, picking them up, or changing the subject. How does a child learn NO that way? Maybe some do, but I think firmly addressing the issue at hand is the only way to go.

Children need to respect authority and that starts in the home. There are other benefits to sticking with firm boundaries and one is that children feel safer with them. Does your child look at you while they’re reaching for the “no-no” item? It’s like they’re telling you they know it’s naughty, they want your attention, but they also crave the response they know is coming. It makes them feel safe. They think, my mom/dad are ALWAYS watching me. “They wont let me get away with this” translates in time to “they wont let me hurt myself”. Do they consciously think this? No, probably not.But consistent boundaries create a strong framework for children to grow within. When the child is sometimes allowed to hit or sometimes gets away with unplugging the tv because no one was watching it anyway, the stage is set for it “sometimes” being ok to do these things and it’s confusing. The last thing you want is for your child to be running toward the street and when you say “NO Jonny!” they laugh and keep right on running. Whether you spank, tap hands, use time outs or give firm commands, do what is most effective for each child. And do it every, single time.

Answer #3

well i do time out with my kids but for 3 mins and it works most of the time, but this is a 1 year old the only thing i can say is move you tv so it covers the plug, that may not learn him the meaning of no but he will be safe from the plug.

Answer #4

Personally i am a spanker myself, espically when it comes to children (or toddlers) and learning NO means NO !This is also iportant when teaching boundries. I believe in hand smacking more then butt spanking, but to each his own. At this point i have 3 children ages 9 6 and 3 and i always employed hand smacking along with NO (childs name here) !

Answer #5

well u need to bust his ass a few good tims, i mserious,dicipline is ok if its hled in a good manor,u may not be the type to dcipline by actions, but there are other ways u know like ,umm i dunno really thats the problem with kids today no good ass beaten,there not afraid of authority anymore,but then again most kids well babies do that ya know, only way for them to know wut no means is to push it to the limit,as for eletrcal outlet buy safty products for that

Answer #6

Baby Discipline Huh?….Children are uncanny in their ability to find the right buttons to push with parents to get attention when they really want it. It is still a baby so the access to the electrical cord should bother you a bit. My younger brother near died messing with an electrical socket when he was around a year old. He tried to plug a toy into the wall and made some nice blue flames. Placing him in an area that confines him would give you an option for a “time-out” area. Or see what Spock has to say http://www.drspock.com/topic/0,1504,164+AgeY1_2+cbx_behavior,00.html

Answer #7

i think like canoehead on this one babys love attention and they want to be held and craddle everyminute of the day. ur doing the right thing on putting him on time out but only one minute might not be enogh he knows hes only going to be there for sixty seconds and are u putting him in his room? u cant expect it to be punishment if u live him ina room full of toys. i dont have kids but this is how my mother raised me and i think is the best way. and hey dont get to hard on the spankins because he might get agressive with other people try to hit them because he thinks its fine. dont worry u will be a great mom to ur child and he will become a big boy.

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