How should I continue on with this guy?

Long story cut short, not really ;; there’s this guy (let’s call him bob as an example xD) I know online, that I’ve known for two years now. We behave just like a couple, only without the “I love you’s”. To everybody else we know online, other than a small cluster of close friends that have known us for as long as we’ve known each other, we’re always assumed to be in a relationship together. As you can guess, we’re not actually together though.

Earlier this year, we kinda.. drifted apart, for w/e reason, although it wasn’t because of a disagreement of any kind. we just.. drifted. xD Before this, however, I did like him, a lot, and romantically, but I figured we were just close friends from his point of view, and never told him about my feelings, to avoid making things awkward. During this time away from each other, I got a boyfriend, and he got a girlfriend.

NOW DON’T GET ME WRONG, I got with my boyfriend (now my ex) because I really did like him for who he was, and not because I couldn’t have Bob. But during the summer, I started talking to Bob again, and I broke up with my boyfriend then, because as far as my personal morals go, it’s wrong to like another guy more than my boyfriend. Feelings are feelings, and I figured I should stop a relationship where I would always be thinking of another guy, instead of trying to forget about Bob.

Back to the point however, Bob had/has his girlfriend, so I never had much hope anyways, and I still thought we were only friends to him, but I dealt with it, and the topic of her only came up once in a while. Things were pretty much calm.

Recently, however, the whole situation kind started to twist and “snowball”. Last month or so, he found out that I like him, although NOT because I told him. I suggested that we.. move on and not.. make much of that, because at that point, the reason was so that things wouldn’t be awkward.

However, a few days back, we got into this argument because I found it strange how he was so nice to me, even though we weren’t together, and what I assumed to be, just friends. I thought he wasn’t being truthful and genuine whenever he did something sweet. Guess what he said? “I used to like you, I still like you, but with xxx (his girlfriend, name replaced for our sake) in this, I CAN’T.” He explained that because I left and got myself a boyfriend, he gave up on me and got a girlfriend as well. /headdesk moment much?

So.. that’s the whole situation. My question now is.. well, what now? He’s not the kind to say.. “I’m sorry, but because the girl I like came back into my life, you can gtfo now.” to his girlfriend or anybody for that matter. Not to be vain, but from two years experience and as really, really close friends with him, I have this feeling that he likes me just as much, or more than his current girlfriend, but he’s not going to break up with her because of that.

I don’t have super strict “good person” morals, but as far as I can think of, there are two windows open now. Wait it out, which I’ve been doing for almost two whole years now, or.. well.. I’m sure we all know the other.

Part of me wants to wait, we’re just like girlfriend and boyfriend anyways. From what I know.. and past experience, .. relationships end. Friendship.. can always be repaired. But waiting is so painfully slow, and whenever the topic of his girlfriend comes up, the regret seriously eats me alive for not telling him my feelings earlier.

The other part of me wants to have him. To know officially that I’m his and he’s mine. I don’t mean I want him to cheat on his girlfriend, I mean most literally that I want him for myself, and for him to break up with her. :I What to do.. I’m so lost. Help me pl0x?

Answer #1

it looks like to me this online relationship should stay online well atleast whilst he has a girlfriend. but when he actually does finish with her then you can ask him that question. but for now youll just have to sit and wait if you really love him but if he really loved you he would have dumped this girl by now.

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