Can any of this be held against you for a promotion?

It seems like she is though. I am going to start documenting it cause I feel like I am getting the bad end of this stick.

Discrimination lawsuits are usually difficult because it comes down to their word against yours. If you claim that you as a member of a protected group are discriminated against it could be hard to establish. Not sure if the federal Americans with Disabilities Act will protect you but it is probably your best shot. You may have state labor laws that grant you more rights though. In any case, good luck!

I am not looking to pursue a lawsuit persay… If I need to take it to head office in a while cause I think it’s consistent then I will… but that would be it for now. But thank you!! :)

Okay don’t shoot the messenger here but I’m going to play devils advocate in the hopes it may be of help to you. Is it possible she’s coming from an overview of behaviors, emotions and mannerisim she saw during those times? Something that is standing out to her and she’s using those topics but not being direct because of the sensative nature and circumstance. Were you more short fused, over emotional to the extent it affected your performance while at work? Or is it something else not really related to those situations and she’s questioning in a vague way? Or could it be a test to see your handling of adversity whether real or imagined. Good supervisors are more about the psycology of bringing out the best in people and the rules and attendence just follow if they can capture the best qualities. Is she searching/testing those qualities in you? Like I said I don’t know her or you …but you do and I’m just tossing it out there.

it’s a fantastically valid point. However… knowing how badly I have to be on my feet for 8-10 hours sometimes without a break, I KNOW my feet will kill after about 5 hours. I don’t limp or make it noticable that I am in pain. If i didn’t mention it, she would have no idea. The only reason she found out about that in the first place is because I went in one day o n my day off to help clean and I had to leave for a couple of hours to get a cortisone shot… As for the nephew… throughout his illness, I have kept her and her husband (the owner) aware of the stages. About 2 months before he passed, we found out that there was nothing they could do. We (my family) made our peace with it. When he passed, I was back to work 2 days later, cause the funeral was planned for the week after… to which she came to. I never broke down because of it, or shown sign of it.

….but every time we sit down for a conversation, she bring up both factors.

Is there someone else you suspect she is considering for the job? If that’s the case your focus needs to convince her your the better person for the job.
Otherwise you may need to really think hard about getting into her head and prepare a response (if she brings it up again) that will put her mind to rest about those circumstances….it’s all in the delivery!!