Good comebacks

Up in your face: Pull out some mints or gum, no words needed.

“Your mom.” or “That’s what she said.” are great generic nonsensical comebacks that dont even have to make sense for people to laugh.

Keep it short and sweet, if you get too detailed then they’re just like, “What?” and it isn’t funny anymore.

Remember, the most important thing about a comeback is making anyone listening forget about what they said to you, and embarassing or shifting all the attention to the person who is getting on your case. Drag it out too long and everyone is still focused on you and will think you’re some kinda nerd getting too complexified on your insults/comebacks.

haha.. funny! but I want more! like thngs u’ve said of thout of off the top of your head

heres some real burns people ..cause obviously these old useless pile of words were made up longg time ago .. okk s o lets get started mmkayy :

1. kk heres one : girls are like bowling balls first they get picked up .. then fingered then thrown to the gutter lol I know itss awsome sauce

2. if some one talks shit bout your boobs girl you can say this ; my boobs are every mans answer.. while your boobs obviously have cancer

3)CHANGE YOUR TAMPON LOL

4)why dont you shut your mouth and open your mind cause there both empty anywayss

5 why dont you support your local rescue unit and .. GET LOST

6. if someone thinks there all that in a bag of chips.. just say.. the only reason why your all that in the bag of chiops is cause you ate all the chips you fat fucking tool

7. why dont you slit your wrists .. it will lower your blood pressure

NOW THESE ARE SOMETHING TO READDD :p

If some one asks you if you are getting smart: Well clearly you have given up

o I got one if a boy comes up to you and says your ugly you could juat say I dont have waves but im still fly ot im hotter then the devil… if a girlcame up to and started to b* around you could just say even cheat codes couldn’t get you up to my level or did you look in the mirror latly o sorry all the ones you looked into broke

if its a guy and he says sumthin bout you ben a guy or anythng like that just tell him he is just jeloud because your balls are bigger then his or you could say hes just jelous because your more of a man then he will ever even dream 2 b I have used these before and they workd but I don’t have any rite now if its a girl so if you find any good 1s then please hit me up sumtim and let me hearem thnx hoped I helpd sum

Um If They Say ‘Go Fxck Off & Sit In The Bush’ Or Something, Say ‘Actually I’d Rather Sit On The Bench, But Thanks For Asking :)’

Ok This Only Works If You Have A Boyfriend… Them: Your Boyfriend Is So Ugly (Or If They Insult Your boyfriend In Any Way) You: At Least I Can Get A Boyfriend.

Them: Are You Listening? Me: No Im Waiting For You To Stop Wasting Your Time.

Pretty Rubbish Yeah, Ill Tell You When I Think Of Better Ones.

are you chewing on a brick or talken to me? because either way your gonna lose your teeth =D

are you chewing on a tampon or talking to me? either way your ganna have blood in your mouth =D

Your so fat You get a bath in the atlantic ocean but even then its a tight squeeze :)

something smells like the pet store :) oh wait its you :|

:) just some off the top of my head (A)

I dont really no what you would answer this to.. Its just one I remember…

‘Your so fat, you jumped up in the air and got stuck!

well if they call you skinny then you probly could… or if there just fat, Then again look out for the people who are contious about there weight (The ones who aent fat but will get terribly insulted) Mwuah ha ha ha haa … yeah its not that evil

OMG! THERE’S SOMETHING HUGE AND UGLY ON YOUR FACE!!! Oh… that is your face… how embarrasing 4 me

If it’s a girl you just don’t like, say if you didn’t have feet, would you wear shoes? When they say no, which they probably will, say, then why do you wear a bra???

Is that shirt on inside out???

If it’s a guy, did your parents have any sons?

girl: were you raised in the pound because your acting like a b*tch

if you have a guy who is nice to you then treats you like crap when his friends were there, go up to him and just ask him why. he won’t no what 2 say

do you have dog crap on your shoe because that’s what it smells like whenever I get near u

hand her a tampon and stage whisper, I understand

if its a girl that is a friendimy say you are a btch from he$$ or if their absoulotly mad & crossing their arms say they are having a btch fit!!!

if someone says youre ugly or something just say something like whens the last time you looked in the mirror, or I may be ugly but ulle always be fat,or stupid

by Devin

if someone says to me “r you gay?” I just walk up to them and say “why are you looking into that mirror?” lol =8

if its something that can be sexual just say “thats what she said” and every1 around will start laughing