For Christians: How do we share and not force

People shouldn’t swear at you, it merely shows intolerance.

I can accept other people have faith and belief systems that I do not share. Why is it so hard for them to accept that I’m not interested? It’s like me being passionate about helping people with eating disorders (having had one myself). I want to help these people, but many don’t want help. All I can do is tell them I’m here if they need me, and you need to do the same with all the people you wish to ‘save’.

Some people can’t accept your enthusiasm for your faith. In my mind, faith is personal. My mother is Catholic, my father is Anglican, but they never tried to ‘share the news’ with us, because they saw our faith as out own journey. If we asked for clarification, they gave it to us in an unbiased way. My Parents and I have different views on the world, but they accept the fact that I don’t believe what they believe. You need to agree to disagree with your father, and anyone else who isn’t wanting to be ‘saved’.

Just because you’re a born again Christian doesn’t mean you’re a drone set to a sole setting of “convert the non-believers”. Be happy with what you have, share your love for your faith with others who are interested. Leave everyone else alone to live their lives.

I’m not a Christian. But, I deeply care for my own faith, and wish well those who have their own.

That being said, when was the last time an aetheist or agnostic knocked on your door to sell you their belief system? In all seriousness, this has never happened to me. However, I’ve had baptist, pentacostal, jehovahs witness, LDS, protestant, catholic and others…all smiling, bible in hand, ready to discourse with the potential heretic, to try to join me to their cause.

In all seriousness, once the door knocking stops, then the reputation goes away. OR, if it’s fair, and we get aetheist door knockers, agnostic door knockers, THEN, I’ll believe that it’s fair.

Until one or the other happens, though…well…the history of the church goes hand in hand with violence. There is no arguing history, and no point in debating how many died because of the spread of the major religions of today. So given the history of violence…well, when was the last time aetheists joined forces to slaughter the Christians or Catholics?

Never, to my knowledge - even Hitler professed some form of Judeo Christian worship.

:) Perhaps that explains better the angst people have. Given the historical context, it’s a huge leap of faith to think that people would ignore all the violence, all the door knocking, etc, and be OK with it.

Just a quick note: If a person doesn’t know how to be saved or that they can be saved, how will they ever want to be saved. I’m not the type to go knocking on doors, and if I was I certainly wouldn’t do on a Sunday, which is when I’m able to fellowship with other believers. My problem is not that I want others to be saved. It is an issue of my father and others who constantly shove it down my throat that just because I’m not as smart as them, I can’t possible be right.

While I appreciate all those who have made comments what I’m looking for is ONLY the best way to handle a situation with my father and others that I know. In this instance he brings it up and if I don’t have a witty comeback he thinks I’m stupid. I know he loves me, but it still hurts, and as he now lives with me I need to be able to gently show him what I know to be true without the alienation, anger and hurt. The problem is the same for those who come to the religion section. People ask honest questions about God, and I’ve noticed most of the time the answers they get are Christians and non Christians arguing with each other.

I want to know how to go about this peacefully!!! I am tired of people making it into a battle of wills, or of others making fun of me, putting me down, or being unwilling to listen to anything I say because I am a Born Again christian. That doesn’t make me weak minded, simple, stupid, however you want to say it. It makes me hopeful and gives me faith in something. It gives me safety, joy, and peace. Being Christian doesn’t mean my life will necessarily be easy, but at least I feel I’m not alone. This is what I want for others.

I want people to know that I’ve asked some of the same questions as they, and usually found the answers to them in the Bible. I want people to know that I spent my early years searching because I didn’t feel right as a wiccan, and so have seen, read about, or been involved im many religions, but none felt good and right to me until now. I want them to know that if I say something, I usually have a good reason behind it. I look at the science reports. And generally, they seem to back up what I’m saying. So I think, the same as every one else. I’m not being led by the nose because I back up everything I believe with careful study.

I feel angry and sad when someone swears at me or brushes me off or turns it into a battle without the use of real knowledge. I hope this explains better what I’m looking for and what I don’t want.

Some people have good reason as to why they don’t want to accept a religion, and that needs to be accepted, just as other people’s belief systems need to be accepted by those who choose not to believe them.

I have seen so many people hurt in the name of religion- young children having stones thrown at them on the way to school, leaving them bleeding, in the battle between Catholics and Protestants in Ireland. Family members having all contact between each other cease because they left the Exclusive Bretheran. People being shunned by their families because they are homosexual, and the bible dictates that it’s some sort of crime. I hear so many people telling me “Oh God is so merciful and loving, he wants to save all his children”. Yet this God seems to think it’s okay to discriminate against other religions, have children bleeding through the hatred of his followers, and tell someone that being themselves is wrong.

I’m also inclined to agree with thedude- when did you ever see agnostic or atheist door knocker? Never. People don’t just feel negatively towards religious folk who bug them with the “good news”, they also feel negatively about telemarketers who call them right on dinnertime, and people trying to sell subscriptions door-to-door. I don’t care who you are, unless you’re a family member or a friend, if you knock on my door before midday on a Sunday, I get cranky and slam the door on you.

If any religious group wants to shake this reputation of being pushy, there’s a simple solution: Wait til someone asks, and then tell them about it. It’s like the phrase “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make them drink”- it’s the same with people and religion. You can preach all you want, but you can’t ‘save’ them, unless they want to be ‘saved’.

Okay, let me pose this question a dfferent way. I’ll give you a little background. I was raised wiccan, my father is wiccan. Since I have become Christian his beliefs have changed from what they once were, but only (it seems) to make me feel intellectually inept, and spiritually void. I feel strongly about my faith, and especially with my father and my athiest sister I want to see them come to the same faith because I believe it so stongly. But lately I’ve taken to avoiding my father because he always brings it up to tear me down and make me feel stupid and it always does.

Now, my actual question, mostly for Christian again, is how I can make a difference in their lives without pushing my faith on them. I want to show them my faith, and point the way, but I don’t want to end up feeling stupid every time I do it.

My friends from church came up with the idea of trying to live not only the ten commandments, but also the fruits of the Spirit found in Galatians 5:22-23.

I am looking for more ideas along those lines, or passages or stories that have helped others in the past to succesfully share their faith with those around them without pushing them away.

Please keep in mind though I am married and have a child of my own, my father moved in with us after my baby brother was born almost two years ago, so this is someone I have to live with daily.

By living and doing as Christ did by example. Someone have a grievance in the house against you, you them? Get a large bowl or tub of warm soapy water. As they are sitting watching TV or whatever time works, go by them, not in their way of view, etc, and commence to ask for forgiveness. Even if you didn’t DO anything wrong, you might of thought it, confess that. Then, by the sure grace of God bare their feet, if not already, gently test the water and wash and dry them. Then just walk away.

Christians do for others without expecting anything in return.

Some have related to living by example and that isn’t demanding anything, but asking for a change and then praying for them. A prayer may be answered in a way you never thought possible, and also in a way better than expected. A nagging person doesn’t get far. Always pray that God would go before you to prepare the heart of the people you meet. Everyone we talk to is a divine appointment. Even here, yes even here!

If the dishes aren’t done perfectly, if there is a spot missed, just be glad there was help (in anything) and praise them for it! Praises work wonders.

As prayers for help around the house, for example, may be answered by Dad or Gpa saying let us cook tonite. Or a walk with the kids and you can have a couple of hours by yourself.

These are just too easy as examples for there is so much to be shared.

In the same way, when witnessing, by not getting into theological debates, point them to the personhood of Jesus. Ask for everything to be given to the person, make them the one who feels in control. Works wonders in person. As we see here by this forum, there is no physical dialogue, no non verbal clues, just bantering.

Another example is by the educational program “Eleutian” where US teachers help Koreans learn English over the internet via webcams. Communication develops and questions are asked and there have been several when they get to the question, “What do you do in your spare time?” That is met by, “I like to read.” “Oh, what do you like to read?” The Koreans reply, “I like to read the Holy Bible.” “Oh, me too! and a connection to that person is instant.” After hearing the me too, the Koreans come back with, “I love Jesus and I love you, too.”

Priceless.

Ahh,, some one who feels the same way I do !! =)

Well for me I look at it this way when you are trully for God and read your bible and have a really close relationship with him ask him to make people want to know

when you love God you just have this glow about yu this attraction that makes people wonder,,,which makes them want to be around you and they wont know why

I find when you are talking about your beliefs with people its very easy to compare or put there lifes into it or say what will happen to them “if YOU dont believe you will go to hell” just by saying that it makes people defensive

Also I wouldnt show the rath or hard ship of God most people (even non believers) already know about hell and all that from Christians but what they havent heard about it the LOVE of God and his mercy and how we are just his kids and he only wants the best for us thats all

The short answer (though I’m sure it’s not the one you want to hear): You’ve told them all about it, now leave them to make up their own minds. Constantly badgering them about it is not going to go down well.

You’re going to get all kinds of weird reactions. Sometimes you can be as polite and kind as snowwhite and you’ll still get hostile replies. Pray. Pray and trust Him.

torikeene - I agree with you. How we share the message of Christ, does make a difference. I also believe that the statement is true, “you can please some of the people, some of the time, but, you will never please all the people, all the time.

We are not called to be people pleasers. We are called to imitate Christ. To live our lives in such a way, as to be salt and light, to the outside world.

The Holy spirit has the job of drawing people to God. Our job is to share Gods word, in love.

We need to try to always be in the right spirit, and not argue. God tells us not to. He is not even into debate. We are to share his word.

The world now accuses us of “shoving the gospel down their throats”. That translates to mean” I do not want to hear about your Christ. Go away”.

The question remains, do we obey man, or God. Do we share in love? Do we contend for the faith of our fathers?

When we stand before the Father, how will we answer, for what we did, or did not do?

If we truly believe what the bible says, is the truth, that there truly is a God in heaven, that we have to one day answer to, that there is a heaven, and there is a hell, and that Jesus Christ is the key that unlocks the door, then, how can we not shout this from the rooftops?

It would be totally unloving, and unkind, to the greatest extent, to have what we believe its the truth… and keep it to our selves… Unthinkable.

Can you imagine sitting on a truth this great, and not making the way available, to any and all???

How could that possibly show love to our fellowman, to hide the truth from them?

How could that possible bring glory to God, to sit on the truth, and not share it???

If we truly believe it, then, we will share it. And if we understand it, we will share in love.

I have never pushed my faith on others and probably never will. Most people don’t even know I go to church every Sunday. I think if people want to know God then they will decide for themselves theres no point in forcing our beliefs down their throats because that makes people sway away from asking for Gods hep even more. I think if somebody really truly needs help God will find them

tori, as a general observation in life, those who lose their tempers in intellectual discussions invariably hold their positions irrationally, else they could calmly provide retort (like I do! :D ).

TheDude: Now I can’t get the mental image of Agnostic door-knockers out of my head. “Hello. Have you ever considered that there may or may not be a god or gods?”

As far as the original question goes (also not a Christian, but here’s my 2c): Any time you raise the issue of religion with someone unsolicited, you’re pushing your views on them. If you don’t want to be seen as pushy, just don’t bring it up out of the blue, and don’t use every opening as an opportunity to tell them about your religion and how it’s the best.

Again, I want to make this clear, I am not the one bringing it up. He brings it up with a question. I answer or tell him I’ll get back to him later if I don’t know.