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Force feed a cat with “pop tarts” so it can no longer move. Then cover it with clay in the manner used when preparing to cook a hedgehog on an open fire. Before cooking the cat on the aforementioned barbecue, place a pair or metal framed spectacles, minus the lenses, strategically around its intellectually superior cranium. Use a stylus to engrave the words: “ Spexy Pop Tart “ into the soft clay in the vicinity of the cat’s thorax. The parenthesized word “Püssy” may also be optionally engraved below the word “Tart” in the vicinity of the cat’s groin. The raw structure should then be tastefully coloured, glazed and baked in a suitable oven to ensure that it is really hot and smexy. HTH.
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