How to deal with a homophobic parent?

Okay so here’s the problem. I am bi and my dad doesn’t like it and disagrees with my lifestyle and thinks that same sex couples shouldn’t be allowed to marry and whatnot. Well I have a girlfriend who I love and he doesn’t like it. He told me that he doesn’t agree with it. He doesn’t accept it and I don’t know what to do. He thinks I chose to be bi. He just doesn’t get it at all. I can’t get him to understand it. Now my momma has given me so much love and support and is totally okay with it. I’m just noty sure how to deal with my dad. He keeps telling me that the bible says it should be man and woman and that if we don’t believe in the bible then that’s our problem type of thing. I am getting the impression that he thinks I don’t believe in the bible and whatnot. How can he say this kind of thing? I don’t get him. He is so difficult. I was adopted and my adoptive parents don’t know because they are totally old skool and would be even more against it so my dad told me that until I come out to them he is going to be this way with me, whatever that means. He is trying to force me to tell my adoptive parents and I refuse to do so. I am at a loss here. What do you all think I should do? And suggestions? I am all ears? It just really bothers me how he acts and the things he says about it. Ughh. It’s frustrating.. I have kind of asked about this before but am still having issues with it and didn’t really get the advice I was looking for. Anyways, any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Answer #1

Well…in my experiance…Vertually every one i know 25 + thinks there is no such thing as being bi…gay yes,being gay is a serious thing and respected by most,but bi to most people my age where i come from think bi people just will do/have anything/anyone,no morals and no limits…they just think its a label that says your easy with sex…Yeah maybe they are all wrong, but its still a common thought weather that pee`s you off or not.So why dont you stop sharing your sex life with your parents and just be thier kid again and be a family…Why is being Bi so important to share when its obviously not a subject ya dad wants to discuss? You could argue ya sexuality makes you who you are, so it needs expressing…but it dont to mums and dads who like me were bought up not mixing your sex life with family life, thats the problem…dont matter if that is what makes you you,its the sex bit…no parent,well dad from daughter wants to know what you do…kina thing…I should delete half this and edit it but cant be bothered…so bring on the wrongs i write.

Answer #2

Note that in all of Jesus’ sermons he never once mentions homosexuality. Jesus preaches against materialism, revenge, judging others, divorce, etc. but not a word about homosexuality. If homosexuality was such a BFD to God wouldn’t God Jr. at least mention it? Most of the religious opposition to homosexuality comes from the Old Testament. Note that the old testament forbids all kinds of things like wearing clothes made of different kinds of cloth, planting fields with different kinds of seeds, eating seafood that doesn’t have scales or fins, eating pork, etc. Funny thing is that modern Christians dismiss all of these other things as being part of the old coveneant and not relevant to modern Christians but they focus on any passage that rationalizes their own bigotry like a laser. Also, most of the OT condemnations are male homosexuality not lesbianism.

Answer #3

I used to listen a lot to Ani Difranco who is bi. A lot of lesbian fans liked to think of her as one of their own and would get upset when she had a boyfriend. I see negativity toward bi from both the gay and straight communities. She wrote a song about it, In or Out.

Answer #4

I used to listen a lot to Ani Difranco who is bi. A lot of lesbian fans liked to think of her as one of their own and would get upset when she had a boyfriend. I see negativity toward bi from both the gay and straight communities. She wrote a song about it, In or Out.

Answer #5

For the record i’m not all for same sex relationships either…but i’m not gonna be like a lot of christians and be all ‘you’re going to hell’ about it. Everyone has a right to feel the way they feel or the way they believe. The way i see it your dad can either get over it and be happy that you’re happy and wish you the best or he can just stay mad at you. I know that having a parent against you and your decisions hurts, but sometimes you have to look past what ppl think and just do what makes you happy.

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