Boyfriend smokes weed

I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for over a year now everything was perfect the first couple of months he would always call he would always answer my calls and I could talk to him about anything he was like a friend…however after a while we started fighting abour stupid things I dont know why and now im just really upset that he smokes weed he never really did it in the beginning well I dont think he did..we’ve gone through many fights about him smoking sometimes he says he wont do it but then I just find out that he does but he just doesnt tell me..I dont want him to lie to me so I said its ok if you smoke just tell me but it really does still bother me he does it like once a week but for some reason it hurts me I dont even know why

Answer #1

My boyfriend smokes alll the time. We used to live together and we fought about it constantly. It was to the point that he was paying for weed before the bills. He eventually lost his job and I have had to support us. He ended up moving out of state to be with family…and recently he came back. I have my own place and he moved in with me. He keeps telling me that I cna’t change who he is …and I don’t want to..but at the same time I feel like I SHOULD B WORTH MORE THAN POT TO HIM. I pay all the bills and he doens’t have a job but it seems like he NEEDS to smoke every day just for him to function and be in a good mood. He is the type to close himself off from the world when he smokes but ever since I told him it was okay to smoke and that I didn’t mind it…WHICH I DO…he has been honest about it with me..I feel like I can trust him more..but now I am unhappy because he smokes in the apartment..and I don’t want to come home to that. I shouldn’t have to lower my standards for a guy who doesn’t have any. I don’t think that smoking pot is the worst thing ever..there are worse things..and I do smoke occasionally..but it is OCCASIONALLY. I have been asking him to get a job for the last two weeks because I need help wit the bills and he keeps saying he will…but he doesn’t. I think that if your boyfriend takes care of you and treats you right then you should be with him. If it does’t greatly affect your relationship then don’t worry about it. My boyfriend is addicted..and it doesn’t sound like urs has a problem like mine at all. Just let him feel like it’s okay to talk to you about it. My boyfriend and I argue over it because it is to that point..and I shouldn’t put up with it..what kinda life is that you know? But yeah..I would just let it go and keep an eye on it..but..don’t lower your standards like I did…BIG MISTAKE!

Answer #2

respect him for the smoking I dont think its the smoking, not to be rude or anything but maybe hes getting tired of u if your fighting and stuff I don’t know its just a suggestion smoking brought me together with people rather than pulling me away just love him for who he is and everything will be alright

Answer #3

For your information my dear, not everyone does drugs to deal with their problems. Marijuana is a relaxent, yes. Some people may use it to relax and get the edge off. Although, most people use marijuana for the same reason that people have an occasional drink.

Answer #4

same problem as me. it kills me. and I dont know why. he stopped for me, but then in august sttarted again and has kept it from me until I found out last week and dumped him. we had been dating for two years an im in love with him so we cant just end it. I told him I didnt want him to do it at all and he wasnt willing to do that for me so I said once every few months and he said okay but I dont know if I can trust him, and still, whenever he does it, it will kill me all over again. people who smoke and are okay with it simply cant see the people who are against it’s perspective. people who reply on here and say “omg you suck, you should be okay with him smoke” are wrong. if you arent okay with it, its not okay. and youre not the only one who thinks that its wrong. you cant be in a relationship that is going to make you unhappy, and if he smokes once a week you will be. you will always try to guess if he is doing it at the moment and stuff. you need to give him the ultimatum and walk away. and if he is truly worht it he will come back to you

Answer #5

Well, the thing about this is… I am running through the same problem. See my sister does pot. She told me when my boyfriend was acting up that he’s the kind of person who lets pot control him rather than him controling pot. He becomes distant, lazy, quits his job and ignores everyone. His friends and family all said to me hes a private person…well, I love him and I call him and text him and he still ignores me because he’s to busy getting high. So, for some smoking pot doesnt really change them. It just bothers you that he’s doing it. While others like me, deal with a boyfriend who closes himself off from the world just to smoke pot. So…my advice. If your man is doing it and really he treats you the same then be happy, eventually he will grow tired of it. But if you are in my shoes when he does it but ignores you and everyone else…then thats an issue I just dont have an answer for. But if someone else does please feel free to tell me whats up.

Answer #6

I think the important thing to keep in mind is that you can change him if he doesn’t want to change. He obviously feels it’s OK to smoke weed and will do it even if he promises not too. It’s also OK that you aren’t comfortable about it. Not everyone feels comfortable around drugs or alcohol and these type of activities can bring on changes that aren’t always positive (ex.: new friends, more hanging out getting high, less concentration on your relationship, addiction). The question you have to ask is: how is this effecting your relationship? I mean, are you just upset because he spends less time with you and because he’s doing an activity that you don’t enjoy OR has he really changed and is he pushing you away. I think you guys should talk about it, not fight. Avoiding arguing or trying to prove a point, just tell him how you feel (ex.: that it hurts you and you don’t want him to lie about it) and ask him what he thinks and feels about it (ex.: what does he like about it? why does he do it? what solutions can he think of to help make this situation better?). Once you understand each other better it will be easier to find solutions to this problem and know what you really both want out this relationship.

Answer #7

ok sweetie, I’m just like you, I despise drugs, al of them, except if they are prescribed to you by a doctor then it’s ok, but if not then it does bother me, it hurts me to see that so many people go to drugs to supposedly to help with their problems but it really doesn’t because somewhere it’s hurting someone else. You need to talk to your boyfriend and tell him that if he cares about you then he would stop for you, but if he lies and does it behind your back then that just means that he might be doing a lot of things behind your back. just talk to him, tell him how you REALLY feel about that situation and see what his reaction is and get back to me,.

Answer #8

Personally I dont see a problem with marijuana use. You even said it’s not that often. I think you need to decide why it really upsets you. Have you even told him that you don’t want him doing it? I dont see a problem with it, but in a healthy relationship you must come to an agreement. Either he needs to give it up, or you need to give him a break. The relationship wont work if you are constantly fighting about something so trivial.

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