when you get molested

how are you doing now. I have a simular story molested at 12 reported it and nonthin happened. you need to tell someone. that will hlp you change from victom to surviver

Brittney,

It has been over three years since you posted this message and i was wondering how you were doing now.

Jennifer

unfortunately you have had the worst crime imaginable done to you. you have had your innocense and your sexuality stolen from you at a young age before you were allowed to develop your sexuality naturally. this is a hard to get over, it leads to exactly what you described. the issues of am I gay? straight? should i kill myself? the depressing mood swings… these are classic symptoms of child abuse. it will take many years of hard work and therapy to help you get over on this. you must remember always that you are not to blame, this was done to you by other evil people. i hope someday that you will find a truly loving relationship, whether it be gay or straight, but you must be strong and not hurt yourself because you are not to blame for the situation you are in.

you will get through this! keep strong girl! xoxo

AN UPDATE: Brittney is no longer with us… She ended her young, troubled life just a few days after posting this cry for help. May she rest in peace… SIGNED: A close friend.

Brittney,

  U need to keep yourself occupied and active. Try dating or just being friends with a guy and girl and see where that takes you. You never know you might find someone that went through the same thing as you or someone you can find trust and make a great " Friendship" with. If u have a job trying being friends with a co-worker, or if u don't have a job try going to the local pub or club. Mingle! 

 If that doesn't work then try the internet and chat lines on the phone... hey were in year 2007... it's the new thing!

You need to start living life and stop thinking about living it! 

But remember ….if you have just meet someone for the first time … don’t lay out all of your problems at the beginning cause you’ll scare them away. Always talk about positive stuff… movies, shopping, music, concerts, traveling…etc….

Good Luck Precious

Hi Brittney my name is Stephanie and i was to molested at the very young age of four and then a few more times as i got older. its so hard for me to hear that u cut yourself because ive been there not knowing y just doing it some sort of self blame and it doesnt get any better the choices ive made in my life have made my life hard to be happy about but im trying to learn how now. i am pretty successful as a registered nurse but have made other bad decisions in my life. it was like eervy one tried to help but it was just me and i couldnt and didnt know how to change being molested sucks and it hurts cause u don’t even know how to fix what feels soo wrong. i dont know if im trying to help or just talk if ive helped great if not i hope u find the help u need to live a normal life like we all strive for Steph

Yes you will find happiness. Remember that in whatever relationship you are in you may be abused, and the way to avoid that is to be assertive from the start about what you dont like. Your councellor may be able to help you role play towards that, or you may want to attend assertiveness training seminars. Just remember that happiness is not something you get from others or of itself. Go about doing the things you love and happiness will follow.

There’s an old story about a kitten that is running round and round in circles chasing its tail. A big old cat wanders up to the kitten and asks it, ‘What are you doing?’ The kitten breathlessly answers, ‘Someone told me that happiness is in my tail so I’m trying to catch it!’

‘That’s funny,’ says the wise old cat, ‘I find that if I go about living my life, happiness just seems to follow me!’

When I read your note, i felt awful because i too was molested when i was 8 by my older cousin and i actually told someone for the first time two or three days ago, my boyfriend… I thought that I was unaffected but it eventually became more apparent that i had to tell someone, and talking helped. Thats why i think that one of the most crucial ways to becoming a happy person again is continuing your therapy. Understand that the therapist cannot force you out of this troubled time, you have to want to help yourself…they're just there to guide you. Cutting yourself may seem like it helps, but it is really something that will keep you where you are. Just know that there is a light ahead of the tunnel and you only have up to go from here. dont try to force yourself to be happy, just play the hand you've been dealt and things will naturally shape up if you help yourself to be helped :) hang in there!