whats wrong with me to make him hurt me like this?

Thank you all for helping me out.:). well tonight I hung out with my boyfriend and it was all cool until he stared playing with his phone, texting and he never text messages… um yeah. eveytime id look over to see what he was doing he would close his phone. he kept going in the bathroom and I could hear him talking to whom? I don’t know. in the begining he would let me use his phone to call my mom long distance. Well I found out my grandpa who im very close to died wednesday, so I asked him to use his phone to call my Mom and he said NO! he doesn’t want anyone touching his phone because of important buisness call.. yeah whatever! so its hard because I treat him so good and I really do love him and I have tried to talk to him about it but he says im tripping. I’ve tried telling him its over but he thinks im joking or something and calls me the next day and acts like I never said anything. what should I do? if I really do break up with him how do I not fall into his trap of me thinking its ok and it will get better?

Answer #1

Hmm…. that is tricky. Express your own need for independence in small ways and then lay it down to him that you want to “spend some time apart”. It will without a doubt put up his radar and he will try to schmooze you to stay together, but think of it this way: I work with about four guys who do this to their wives and girlfriends (all latin but that is not the point) and they brag about their ability to do this to their women. Their girlfriends on the side usually know about the main girl, and the main girl they know would kill them or leave if they found out about the girl or girls on the side. They all do this very well and need to “grow up” but they are even older than I am except for one who is a young 24. I personally think this is horrible. If you have any real respect for yourself, then stand up for yourself and claim your need for independence. Ween yourself from men for a while and don’t go jumping again for a guy that seems “fun” rather than faithful. Good Luck.

Answer #2

Dear Malone, I just read your other question.. There is nothing wrong with YOU!! Some people (like your boyfriend) take a nice person (you) as weakness. They see someone who smiles, who is caring, who is genuinely a good hearted person, and they take it for a weak person. They try and take advantage of you….treat you bad….knowing you will stay around because you are nice and caring “weak”. They may try and make you think any misunderstanding in your relationship is your fault. They keep you around because there is nothing better in their life (and there never will be) What to do????

Number one DO NOT CHANGE! Stay nice, stay good hearted, keep the mentallity of looking out for a boyfriend/husband. Keep that caring pleasant personality. This is a wonderful quality you have. So many times a girl (when in a relationship like yours) can develop a hardness towards people….changing their personality, feeling like a sucker because they are nice, and because they were nice they feel like they can be walked all over in a relationship. So (because of the jerk boyfriend) they develop a hard nose attitude toward guys and future relationships….In reality they are allowing this (jerk) to control and change who they/ you really are, which is nice,caring, goodhearted person,etc… Keep your wonderful personality….embrace it….confident in what you are all about. AND protect it by NEVER allowing anyone (boyfriend, friend, or family) to take advantage of it. You also protect it by keeping yourself in relationships with truly good people. You can have aquantances, but never have meaningful relationships with people who don’t appreciate a quality personality like yours. By doing this it will bring you alot of happiness and bring you wonderful relationships in the future. You have heard the statement what you give is what you receive….this is true….you however have the quality of being nice without expecting anything back….it is your natural way of thinking and acting….you are powerful because of it and I want you to recognize this,AND begin to remove people from your relationship life who do not know how to appreciate you..(it). Familycoach

Answer #3

why would he even begin to treat you this way your verry pretty and i can tell smart. he is treating you like he cant find his own damn age. it seems he is acting like a child when he needs to be a man and talk to you. but to get rid of his ass just block his # ignor him and let him found out its over when your on the arm of a much better ( in all aspects.. expecially the way he treats you) man. and i know you can do this every girl can we are strong independent people. and with out us guys would be… nothing

Answer #4

Be a woman! Stand your ground and be assurtive with him. If you want it to be over because he doesn’t respect you the way you respect him then you do deserve much better and you come off to me as a wise person. You know what you want and you’re not afraid of breaking up with him, that’s very good…(a complete weakness of mine.) Maybe you should try to get ahold of his phone sometime when he doesn’t have it with him and he’s not around or something unless he carries it with him 24/7, which very well may be the case.

Answer #5

Dump his as if he’s treating you bad end it it’s not worth it for a girl to be hurt by their boyfriends

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