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What should I do? What am I?
I’m not really sure where to start so if you cant understand what im saying then… I’m 13 years old. I think I’m bisexual. I’m not sure. I can’t tell my mum because she hates the idea of same gender sex and thinks it’s unnatural if you’re not straight. I have a problem with eating. I eat and eat and eat, then I starve myself or suddenly make myself lose weight. I’m about 5 foot or 4”11 and I weigh nearly 6 stone :S I want to weigh 5 stone. I want to stay 5 stone. I’ve got a big fear of being fat. I’ve got a massive fear of being lonely with no one I can talk to or being unloved or feeling unloved. My dad’s bipolar. I want to be tested to see if I’m bipolar but my mum thinks its a load of rubbish. On the outside I’m more like her and you get half of your mother (which I’ve got on the outside) and half of your dad. So I’m think… What if I am bipolar because I’ve got some symptoms. But like I said, my mum doesnt think its possible. I’ve had a guidance counsellor since I was 9 but now I’ve moved to secondary school and in my second year there my guidance counsellor doesnt talk to me any more. My tempers getting worse. I bunk, drink, smoke and I get into fights and even argue with teachers and swear at them.
But I have no one to talk to that I can properly open up to anymore, what with my counsellor always telling me to go back to lessons when I want to see her. And do I have an Eating Disorder?
Well.. the first thing to do is not be so like the, I know what you mean by having a councelor that dosen’t like you and stuff, but your attitude has got to stop, I use to be like you, I use to take my anger out in school, that semmed the only place where I could just get myself out… But it’s wrong, I myself was very little close to getting expeled, I almost even tried to hit a teacher, my situation got bad because I had no sopport at home or anathing and I had no idea of who I was, And sometimes I still don’t. Just give it time… When you are yung there is times where we don’t know we are and we are finding out, that is what growing up is, becoming who you will be, meaby there is a teacher that is close and you can talk to her, your family doctor, Some other relative?? Just get someone to be there for you, ussually all I need is someone to show me that he/she cares, meaby that is what you need to show you somebody cares, find help and I assure you everything will be ok.
GOD LUCK:)
When it rains, it sure does pour. I am sorry things are so rough for you. You’ve definitely got something going on. The binge/restricting sounds like bulimia, but as you know we cant diagnose online. And genetics dont quite work that way, but whether you’ve got full blown bipolar, or tendencies towards mood trouble, it is probably something that needs to be checked out. As for your counselor. Refuse to go back to class. Tell her you need to talk to her, and you’re not going back to class until she sets a time to meet with her. Is there any one else you can get help from? A teacher? A doctor? Your dad? A relative (aunt, grandparent?). As for the sexuality stuff, give it time. You really dont have to have an answer right now. In the GLBTQ, the Q is for questioning. It’s ok to be questioning stuff. It doesnt mean anything for now. It just means you’re a normal teen who has questions about what their feelings mean. For now, I’d focus on getting the rest of your life back together.
I think it is a little too soon to honestly tell whether you are bisexual or not - everybody goes through a curious phase (for some it never ends, ha) but it sounds a little like you are just insecure and wanting some love and attention. like bumblebee, I do not understand the “5/6 stone” or “bunk” but if you really want to loose weight, you CAN. its a new year- make it a resolution and KEEP IT. during your weight loss, focus more on being healthy more than looking good. there are many health risks associated with being overweight - some are scary. anybody worth your time and attention will see you for who you are on the inside. learn to love yourself, and chill on the partying - you have your whole life ahead of you.
good luck
Wow. No doubt, this is exactly how I feel. And I’m as well, 13 years old. I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and everything. It’s wack. I’d love to talk to you sometime, and maybe help you in any way possible. Just send me a funadvice message and we can chat anytime.
I dont understand the 5 stone and stuff. but I must say that you need help. im not being mean or anything but there is deffinately a problem here. I would go to the guidence and tell them EVERYTHING that is going on. ask them not to tell your parents yet if you dont want them to know. but theres a problem here. I wish you luck.
A family member or something. Meaby talking to your mom so you can just get it out and not having to hide such feelings from her, You know just getting it all out so she knows what you are feeling and having more comunication so you can get trough this time??
I’m not allowed to see a doctor with out an adult or something :/ My form tutor is the one teacher I trust but she doesnt really have enough time. I have refused to go back to class until she said come back at lunch or tomorrow. I go back then oh. she isnt there. :/
I’m sorry to hear what your going through. But I encourage you to consult a psychologist or therapist, ASAP. The behaviors you mentioned are on the extreme level, so I suggest getting professional help so you would know how to deal with this problems. Your mom maybe having hard time to accept that there is a possibility that you can get your dad’s bipolar disorder. But trying not to accept and recognize the possibilities, may cause more harm than good, so it is better to talk to your mom and consider seeking for help, for your peace of mind.
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