What is wrong with me? Heres my story, Help please!?

I don’t think theres anything wrong with ya, I think it really is a girl thing. I know what ya mean bout sorta feeling like ya have to compete I was like that or should I say I am like that at the mo over my ex. we technically were broke up when he went away on a lads hol but to everyone that knows us we were getting back together when he came back everyone could see the feelings that we had between us, well it ended up he is now going out with his one night stand from the hol, she goes to cambridge ni (so in my head is uber clever) she’s rich ( can spoil him more than me), she is a dancer(so must be brill in bed cause she can put legs behind her head), well you get the point I imagine her to be brillant, and I was absolutely devastated when he came home and said he had met someone. but I’ve been having the same problem I have went on dates with real nice guys and I haven’t followed through cause I feel like they have to be bigger and better than him, and the one dude I met who I really liked I scared myself cause I ran away the idea of letting someone in getting to know them and being close to them in any sense just freaks me out cause I still have feeling for my ex. It’s like he’s a drug to me just hanging out with him puts a smile on my face for a while and we have shared a few ‘moments’

I’m sorry I’m going on but well for me I’m not moving on caus I’m not over him and I’m scared maybe your just not ready to get that close to a new dude yet

thank you both so much!! Helped a ton! And I met someone really nice and is going good so far Thanks again!