wanting a baby?

I’m 16 yes I know im young you dont have to tell me..Anyways me and my boyfriend has been togeather for along time..for the past few weeks I been feeling empty inside and I didnt know why..well one night layin in bed I thought about haveing a baby my emptyness got stronger..I now know that I want a baby..me and my boyfriend have talked about it we both strongly want a baby togeather..Mom knows were planning on to get married..I grew up way to fast.. I dont have a teenage life I work nonstop at huddle house..when I get home im cleaning..and then cooking dinner..I’m thinking since every one says havein a baby would ruin your teenage fun years well for me I think I dont have that im an adult a lot of people say for a 16 year old girl I act like im 36..I’ve seen my friends have these angels of babys and out partyin while mom and dad takes care of these angels..I just want a baby id be a good motheri know I would..but I need help on this..Whens the time and what do I do to help me get pregnant dureing sex?..thanks

Answer #1

I still think that any age under 21 is WAY too young to have a baby! You barely know yourselves at that age, you need to travel the world and experience life and grow as a human being before you can take on bringing a new life into this world! Yes it all sounds so exciting to be a mom and have a baby,but you need to be grounded and fulfilled as a person first. A baby is not going to miraculously make you feel better. Please just take time to think about what you are sacrificing. You have all the time in the world to have a child, what is the RUSH? enjoy life with your partner first and cherish the this time that you have ALONE with him because once the baby comes you’ll never get that alone time together again and can cause serious strains and doubts in your relationship. I also stress that you and your partner have a STRONG relationship and foundation, because a baby will test those qualities everyday!

Answer #2

I doubt you will have the kind of relationship with you boyfriend at the age of 16. You might be mature for your age, but you are still not an adult and have not experience many adult things yet to come.

I’m only 20 myself and could be a mother of a 5 year old just now, but down to reasons I am not. I look back and think there is no way I could have supported my child. The father who was nice at the time of meeting and me falling pregnant, turned out to be horrible and violent, so I had to leave that situation.

Now I live with a partner I can say for sure I am happy with and I have not thought about ‘testing’ our relationship with a baby, because it is doomed for disaster.

These are natural urges that you body is tricking you in to becoming pregnant, this does not mean however you should act out on them. It is not 1750 anymore, we have a choice.

Do not your judgement be clouded. You are only 16, you have many years to change and even in 4 years time you will feel totally different about the world and yourself. I was ignorant like you at 16… You are not a 36 in a 16 year olds body. The fact that you feel you should have a child this young without a mutual feeling from your boyfriend and a proper support system shows your immaturity.

I know it has been a year since you posted this question. I just hope you haven’t gone and got yourself pregnant.

Answer #3

16 huh!

Well if you are stupid enough to think that having a baby will fullfill “your emptiness” then there is really not much that can be said to you.

Except that I hope that you are rich OR that there is someone ready to swoop in and take the child away from you.

It is bad enough that people are still getting pregnant like condoms and birth control does not exist …but to actually want to purposely bring a baby into your young, naive, barely here on earth existense is taking it to another level.

What happens when you realize that the emptiness was just your need to be something more than you are now – why can’t you be “filled” with an education OR the need to be successful or a freakin puppy.

Thanks for being another moron – who is so self centered and STUPID that you would risk bring another dumb a** chid into this world — because the harsh truth is that stupid parents (the younger, the worse) usually have bad, annoying, disrespectful and STUPID children – who are sent into the world hateful and resentful because their mother was too concerned with herself or others to rear the child properly.

You and people like you are one of the reasons that this world is going to crap.

Helpful advice - please remember the number 411. That is what you will need to call to be directed to the state public aide office and get a slew of public assistance … so I guess your real question should be “Hey America, feel like taking on the retarded burden of another useless child … born out of desperation, stupidity by 2 people who can barely have permission to drive and can’t do much else”?

Do the world a favor and read a book, get an education OR at least wit till YOU can afford to take of the baby and not place the burden on all others. Also kick whatever person raised you - because seriously they f-ed up bigtime.

Answer #4

I agree on all your comments. Yes I want a baby too.To cuddle and love in my arms. But I think it’s not the time to yet. I’m only 15 and I think I would be really stressed out all the time. Then if you have a baby you won’t be able to hang with your friends or go no where because you’ll all ways have to watch the baby. And change its dippers and feed it and give it lots of attention. you won’t be able to go no where. And to me I don’t have no time to be stuck in my house and watch a baby all day. On the real I really do want a baby but its just not the time yet. And my boyfriend yes he wants one too but me and him just don’t think its time yet.I’ve been going with him for awile. To tell you the truth I was preagnant a cuple of weeks ago but I lost it because of lots of stress. I was only a few weeks old. I was happy and all. But in some way I wasn’t. Because all my friends said it will ruen my life because ill have to stay in the house alot. All my friends were really happy for me.. Then when I found out that I lost it I was really sad. After a few days later I was kinda happy I wasn’t no more. But yes I agress on all your comments.

Answer #5

me an my bf have been goin out a year an half now and couple months ago we started talking about babies we talked about it properly because im 16 and he’s 18. i talked tomy connxions lady and she said about how you going to pay for all of it ? will you have the time? were you going to live? after that chat she said i think your’ll be fine but me an my bf agreed on waiting till im 17 an he’s 19 but this emptiness is gettin bigger and every time i see one or a young mum it makes me get all up tight and i end up crying i just cant handle it no more i really want to be a mum and have my own kids you might think im mad and im to young but i can’t help the way i feel!! my bf says we have to wait till oct because he’s moving in then but the more i wait the more stressed im getting we both are even starting to buy things for it when it comes but it aint even in there yt!! i just need some advise on how i can not get so uptight till then pls help!!!!!

Answer #6

“teenage fun years” is another way of saying “stupidity”. You’re a mature adult and you’re not missing out on anything. All those people out “having fun” are the people who tend end up old, alone, and with sexually transmitted diseases. The smart ones break the rules like St. Valentine did, and just marry the ones they love.

What you are feeling is 100% normal and natural. You want to get married, and that is also natural. Most people in the USA and Europe pretend that you’re still a child at 16, but you’re not, and whether you marry or not, you’ll inevitably move forward with having a baby, since the urge really is irresistable. More than half of girls throughout the world lose their virginity BEFORE age 15, so to pretend that they’re still children and should not marry is hopelessly stupid, will only result in single-motherhood or some other kind of broken home.

Don’t let anyone tell you you’re too young to know what you’re doing. I’ve found that the people that don’t know what they’re doing at age 16, are the people who are still idiots at age 60. You want to marry, and in my opinion, you’re 10 steps ahead of the rest of the morons in the world. You can’t do better than having a warm and loving family, nothing else matters as much. Love, romance, and family can literally carry you through even the stormiest holocaust, so in my opinion, there’s no advantage to doing it the way everyone else says you should do it (most of them are divorced, grumpy old people anyway!).

Congratulations on your wisdom, you know deep down inside what the right thing to do is, and you don’t need anyone else to cloud things up for you. Trust yourself, and don’t regret the decisions you make with care.

Don’t forget to get married! You want a baby now, but only because your body is telling you that you have a stable man in your life. You’ll need him forever, so make sure you marry.

Once again, congrats, and good luck with your new family!

Answer #7

In my opinion, life is a challenge no matter what age you are. Waiting until later to marry and have children does not make anything easier, in fact I believe it actually makes things more difficult the longer you delay it. When women have their children young, they have the rest of their lives after that to do other things. Most of the problems with young motherhood are societal, and not directly related to young motherhood.

For example, before the government outlawed marriage for young people in the 1970’s, it was possible for a young couple to marry, have children, and have a stable job. Now, not only is it difficult to get government permission to marry, but the government blocks young people from working through so-called “child labor laws”.

Before the government started condemning marriage, couples would marry young (the husband was usually older and financially stable), have their children, then when the children grew up, the couple would start a family business of some sort, so everyone in the family would have a job if they needed it. Then, since the mother’s children were nearly grown, she could go to college, start her own business, or travel around in africa as an amateur botanist or whatever.

If you read about women from the early 1920’s and whatnot, that’s pretty much what you see. Young motherhood, and then a strong family to support everyone in all their ambitions later in life.

Unfortunately, government oppression of marriage has made that naturally-perfect family-based society nearly impossible, so if you pursue that route, you will face a lot of opposition, above and beyond the normal challenges of life.

It’s not impossible though, and it’s certainly a better way to go even with the extra challenges, so I encourage you to follow your heart and just do it. When you are older, you won’t regret it.

Answer #8

Firstly girl. Think about all of the situation, think realistically not just clever. Think about the cost. Yes your a working girl who has a loving boyfriend who is also working but the question is again are you both getting enough income to support a baby aswell as yourselves. Do you already have a house big enough for the two of you and a baby. If not you need to take this into concideration. Bills don’t come cheap. If you do have a house then thats one thing covered. Then you need to think that you will need to go onto maternity leave, you won’t be working forever while your pregnant so then that will leave your boyfriend with the money coming in which will be less than your recieving now as you’d no longer be working. The baby isn’t going to just need enough money for its needs for when its born, its going to need you and your money for 16 years Have you thought about all the babies needs?

Then there is giving birth, it can make or break you. What happens if you go into depression which is known to happen after giving birth causing the problem of not bonding with your new born and many other things. And what do you think of being woken up every 4 hours of the night to feed your new born? Having a baby is all work and no play. It’s nothing like a hard working day on your job, its a full time mom.

No I don’t have a child of my own. I’m 24 and want a child but I don’t have a loving boyfriend to share my life with yet. But I have grown up from the age of 13 looking after my younger brother and sister because my mother and step-father wanted to go out every night drinking, leaving the children with me at the age of 2 weeks old. I had carried this on until I was 19 years old because I had no choice.

Now if all what has been said here has been giving the thought then yes go for it girl. But you say your too smart, smart in many ways maybe but to spell the most simple words incorrectly doesn’t make you look smart.

Know what your doing don’t think you know what your doing. There is a lot in my life I wished I could change because I was so naieve at the time I made those decisions. Investigate this baby thing as much and as deep as you can. A baby should be brought into this world with love and support.

Answer #9

Hmm, actually lovers2000 has a good point. 16 is young to have children, as you are only a child yourself going through maturity and things. But yet, 18 is still very young to have children. So if you want children have them in a few more years. At least in the mean time, you can save money for the planning of having a child.

Answer #10


Since you criticized this girl’s spelling, I’d like to point out that you consistently use the word “your” when you should use “you’re” or “you are”. You have ommited necessary commas and periods, and you have written many incomplete or run-on sentences. Also, “recieving” is correctly spelled as “receiving”.

Just a friendly jab, no harm meant.

Answer #11

As I say we are all not perfect in the meaning of ‘smart in many ways’ But then did I ever mention that I was smart? I think not.

Answer #12

And plus if you thought like a 36 year old you would think a lot differently, because your 16. You want to give your baby all the things it need and wants and a sixteen the wants won’t be in the picture, and plus does he want one.

Answer #13

well Yah did u read the thing it says i work my ass off (hint) job My boyfriend has a job also..i wouldnt want my parents raisin my child.im to smart for that

Answer #14

Just a word of advice: Babies don’t stay babies..think about the responsibibly of rasing a child. Think about when they turn on you and hate your ways of raising them. It’s a big responsibibly that last for the rest of your life. Please don’t rush it. Rather than desiring a baby, ask your self if you want a child. Parenting is the hardest job in the world, I know, I’ve raised my own. Please give yourself more time. Believe me, the person that you are at 16 will NOT be the person you become at 25..35, 45 and so on. I wish you the best.

Answer #15

well girl…

  make sure your not on top...make sure he nuts in you...after sex lay with a pillow under your hips so the sperm travels down where it needs to go.

Also…make sure you have sex 2 weeks after the day your period started. Hope this helps!!!:)

Answer #16

i think what ever makes you n your boyfriend happy im about to turn 17 a few weeks ago i found out i was pregnant and jus a few days ago i had a miscarrage so be prepared for thee ups and down now more then ever i wantto havea baby more than anything but i jus know our relationship isnt stable enough so i have to wait….

Answer #17

I hate to be rude but people on here are mostly in there 30’s and dont want us young people making the mistakes they made. I think when your ready you will get pregnet and if it happens it will all work out

Answer #18

i think you should think of the out come of this such as the good things and the bad things you should also talk to a parent of close family member for more advice somebody with a baby would be ideal

Answer #19

I agree

Answer #20

hi, i’m 16 too and i have been feeling the same way for a long time now, my boyfriend wants to get me pregnant..and i know inside that i want to but there are so many floors that come with it. like what my parents will say and what they will do. will they kick me out? will they hate me? i argue with my parents 24/7 but i could never argue about something this big? don’t you think about things like this? what do you think your parents will say? plz wb

Answer #21

alright, I’m 19, and pretty much engaged. I want a baby too, but I know I need to wait. My boyfriend (soon to be fiance) and I both really want a child, but are waiting until we have the money, home, and security needed to have a child. I really think you need to consider everything before getting pregnant, because the worst thing you could ever do would be to invite life to this world, and then destroy it because of a regret. If I were you, I would wait until I were at least 18, when you aren’t considered a minor anymore.

Answer #22

make sure your making the right decision!!!!

and good luck with the baby!!!!!

i was thinking of also having a baby but than i thought tomyself i havew my whole life ahead of me to have babys!!! Buti think im at leats waiting till im 17 or 18!!! because me and my b/f want to have twins in the FUTURE!!!

Hope everything works out!!!

Answer #23

I had a baby young 19 and I wouldn’t take it back for the world but there are so many things I wish I could have done. I miss so many things like being able to go out with no worries. I love being a mom but please trust me on this one you only can be a teenager once and it is so much fun. It puts a strain on the realationship the sex. I hope he has a good job, he’ll need one your own place. It’s hard having all these responsibilites so young. Think hard about it it’s something that will change your life in many different ways. Plus I have to say it you are too young are you done high school, do you plan on doing anything with your life. Put on a long hold if you want a baby.

Answer #24

Im 18, and i know how you feel! I grew up waay too fast.. I work 2 jobs homeschooled myself, and take care of my 2 y/o son..His father is in the picture but we’re not together any more. I cook and do all the cleanign at my hosue. My mother works a lot, but doesnt do her share.. I felt the same emptiness you are feeling, and even though my son fullfills a lot for me, I still feel this emptiness inside..

So before you descide to have a baby, make sure it’s what you really want.. My son changed my life for the better and i love him more then anything. but please dont make any irrational choices..

These have been the roughest 2 years of my life, I thank God everyday, but I do regret having my son so young.. Hope this helps!

Answer #25

All good points. im 19 my self and would love a baby, i thik it comes form being a very nurturing person at heart. but i also live with my fiance and two roommates( who are ok with the idea) but we all work a job three of us work two and its still tough. although i have a friend that has two sons and cant be happier. i also know a girl that is 19 has 4 kids and the dads in jail for drug charges and she lives in a run down house ina bad end of town, with no money no food and her kids are suffering from it. all im saying is that if money wise and stability wise your ready take on good long hard look at how tough it is, and if you still decide your ready then the best of luck and i hope you are able to have a happy life and a loving marraige

Answer #26

If you have thought about all of this and may be much more then the next thing your best of doing is speak to your doctor or a family planning clinic.

Answer #27

Have you ever sat down and thought of how much a baby cost. Do you and your boyfriend have steady jobs? Who is going to pay for the baby and all of its needs when it comes. Mom and dad are not going to be their forever to help you out. I am not trying to talk you out of it, but you need to sit down and think of the possibilities of having a baby, then your life without a baby. If you think you could care for the baby without ANY help, then do what you think is right.

Answer #28

If you want a baby just wait until you’re ready and with someone that you love and loves you back and will ber there with you through everything.

Answer #29

Dont do it having kids now will spoil your fun be a young adult then when you turn 18 and still feel the same then go for it your young have fun while you can!

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